unfortunately when quitting smoking it kicks our bodies into detox mode .. cold sores are the bodies way to expel toxins quickly from our tissues .. try to let it run its course without too much suppression on your part other then keeping it clean and dry

your short adn long term plans sound wonderfull ! stay the course you can do it ! =)

...Jodi, the banana eating buddhist

11/2

Feeling tired and a little dizzy. Due I think as much to the increase in mental energy and physical energy during the day as the detox symptons now. I looked back on my last trial, and it took 14 days for the tiredness to lift completely, and I was detoxing a more rapidly due to the hour of hiking I was doing daily. So we'll see. Constipation definitely less due to the lettuce yesterday so will keep that ongoing. Don't feel like I need my green tea, the only thing preventing me is tiredness and concerns about getting headaches so will keep up with the one cup a day, which is a pint of green tea, not a cup actually, until I can locate a natural spring around here which I am excited about so can replace all my fluid intake with beautiful clean water. Early days I figure. Daniel Vitalis has some fascinating utube stuff. Cold sore still cracking. Yuk. I will not slather cream on it though as per Jodi's advice, thankyou for your lovely support on my 'goals' section, it really gives me a wonderful feeling to have all that read and for someone to think, wow that sounds great, go for it.

Events Aah the joy of the unemployment office, french style! Same the western world over I think. Very concerned my boys teachers are not up to scratch, got an inexperienced 19 year old assistant and a new teacher who is young and very quiet. I felt so strong about this because I saw them really struggling with crying kids, that I volunteered to help there but they are too young to see it as an opportunity, they are out to prove they can manage, so there we go.

Eats: (rather too much... keep snacking to replace? what? must be the craving of cooked still)

spinach and banana smoothie
3/4 melon
two cups dried fruit
half a lettuce with a dressing of dates/garlic/olive oil/water/miso
cup of olives
half a cup of dates
avocado
apple
handful of snap peas or whatever those little flat ones are called.
handful of flax crackers in bed

Arrow xxx

hey hun you are doing great if you are feeling really tired, headachey and woozy/dizzy maybe do a quick calculation and make sure you are getting enough food ... and make sure to keep hydrated .. dehydration slows down detox and lots of fluids help flush things out faster stuff like dried fruit and crakers can absorb more fluids from you because they rehydrate withen your system so keep hydrated !

...Jodi, the banana eating buddhist

11/2

I'm sorry I can't remember, I'm too tired, what I did yesterday but I know I kept it all raw.

12/2

'Came out' as raw. Friend had a bring a long buffet lunch and I took my flax seed crackers which people were pronouncing as delicious, in fact complimenting Sue on them, who's a wonderful chef by trade. How fantastic? I explained how I'd made them and that got me onto saying what a dehydrater was and then I probably should have shut up, they all looked fascinated but gradually disappeared as I got on to how raw food combats fatigue and disease...not really what people want to hear is it? When I'm nervous I just blather and come across as very confident and chatty but I always end up feeling vulnerable wondering what they think of me. I'm sure a lot of people feel the same way. Next time I'll keep it quieter and let them ask the questions...:-) My friend insisted I take back buffet left overs. I have quiches and potato salads in my fridge, my favorites, my mouth was watering. Difficult but resisted.

Eats:
lots of lettuce
orange
apple
2 avocados
1/4 cup pumpkin seeds
1/4 cup olives
banana and sunflower seeds with cashew nut butter.

Arrow XXX

ps Jodi, your salad dressing list is amazing! Printed off and on my fridge.

doesnt matter what anyone thinks about you as long as you think of yourself

besides ! we love ya ! so no worries !

and yea isnt that dressing list a real monster lol .. ive tried every single one and honestly i cant even tell you which are my faves cuz they are all good in their own ways ..

just tweak them to your taste (i tend to like more savory garlicky flavors on salads hehe)

...Jodi, the banana eating buddhist

I have read your posts and I can relate with the difficulty you are experiencing. Best wishes that you keep moving forward.

I have only thing to say that could help. Try to TRANSITION. An ordered TRANSITION. Set a goal for what you know you can do with the raw food on a daily basis and allow that you are working to attain your ideal scene. Steps, baby steps, or big steps. What works for you that you can do.

You are detoxifying. What you eat has an effect on that. When you get settled in your new situation take some time to read some books. About transitioning to a raw food diet. Books that include information on detoxifying and the healing process. That will help you a lot. Stay safe and just do your best.

13/2

Thank you for all your kind words of support and advice. It means a lot to me. For starters I was not drinking enough and hadn't realised that all the dried stiff was dehydrating me. I had got it into my head that tap water was not good for me, but didn't want to buy mineral bottled water but wanted to locate a spring to get my water naturally! So I stopped drinking a lot, which is pretty silly. Trouble is I don't have time to pick up dirty kids socks off the floor let alone go hunting for natural springs :-) Not yet anyway.
Can you recommend some good books with detox info if you read more, mybenson? Finances has prevented me doing that so far but one good book might really help with in depth stuff. Do you know it is pretty hard to know how to go this because it changes everything. I have a big bowl of salad for lunch and then half an hour later I'm thinking well I could have eaten the whole lettuce! The amounts required are just so much more than i am used to. And I just prepare small amounts of thing then I go for a little snacks inbetween. I think it takes planning and time to immediately think of tasty raw meals, and experience.
I don't even know what I've eaten today like I can't remember clearly because I have just been grazing indiscriminately, goes like this. Super tired and boys were foul all day. Salivating again today over dairy.

2 oranges
banana with cashew nut butter (that can't be raw?! don't care, whatever gets me through) and sunflower seeds
big salad with cashew butter nut and sun dried tomato dressing
3 apples
1/2 pint carrot juice
2 bananas with cashew nut butter and sunflower seeds. Divine.
1 orange
1 avocado

I don't know about transistioning exactly because I've already committed to no cooked. For 100 days. Yes definitely not going to focus on the length of time there. Pure stubborness is preventing me from buckling, but I did want Detox to be lifted by now thankyou very much, or am I just pms? ...Probably that too. I'll think about how I can adapt my diet though to make it lighter/cleaner once I'm over this initial stage. Last time detox was definitely harder but quicker, due to no dehydrater, must be said, and an hour of nordic walking a day. In bed beofre 9pm tonight.

I noticed you were 2 years in raw Jodi, any comments on how you feel to give me inspiration?? Anyone else?

Well take care all,

Arrow XXX

14/2

So 2 weeks today on raw.

I am still tired but today felt an increase in energy or at least I felt I had more stamina, still a little spacey and tired, but generally almost back to normal except better. I think another week and I will be jumping through hoops again. Brain foggy today still definitely. When I did my nordic walk I felt strong and went the whole length (uphill for 40 mins basically without noticing it today) hadn't even gone that far in the last few weeks. Fairly effortless today. Still emotional, suddenly in tears for little reason. Coldsore almost gone. Face has taken on that glowy quality. Weight coming off, jeans looser round the tum, the only area where I want to lose weight. Still got blocked up ears. Clearer thinking and definitely more patient with the boys. Still tired and sleeping very soundly at night, like I really need it.

2 apples
11/2 pints spinach and banana smoothie with spirulina
cup of dried fruit
2 courgettes pasta and tomato sauce with bell pepper and garlic - energy and well being enhancer
2 avocados with olive oil and salt
banana with cashew nut butter and sprinkles of sunflower seeds - addictive - I don't want to know how unraw cashew nut butter is :-)
cup of olives
lots of water and
a little aperatif of prune wine - smooth rocket fuel, a friend made some and it is delicious, at least its organic

Arrow XXX

15/2

Another day on raw. I tell you what happened today, bizarre, and it happened yesterday, when I started raw I didn't fancy my green tea at all, just didn't seem to want it and certainly didn't like the taste. Yesterday I felt nauseous after my large cup but dismissed it because frankly I have never gone with out caffeine of any description and wasn't ready to face the headaches! Well now I'm ready because...today after my green tea I felt even more nauseous, for about two hours. It's a bio green tea so I would have assumed it would have been better for me. I don't know if it's the brand of tea but I am right off it, and it coincides with starting to feel a LOT better. Significant improvements today, including knowing instantly where I put things, which is a big bonus getting the boys off to school in the morning. This morning I DANCED with Max to Dora the Explorer, and it was pretty energetic too, the energy seems to have come back into my muscles and skin. My face has colour. I feel better, definitely. My emotions kicked in to surprise me with a bout of tears as my mother (80 years, widowed) called to let me know she'd had an unpleasant call from my ex's family. Won't go into details. But back to the rawing, it's all good and my sense of smell seems more heightened. Singing lesson was so excellent today, damn it I can't afford them but she's so lovely and she did numerology for me today and it was so accurate it was spooky, in fact she's a little bit spooky because she is telepathic. Seriously she doesn't acknowledge it but she is and she is just lovely. ANd the voice lessons are intensive so good. You know the law of manifestation? Well a few days ago I practised manifesting that people would give me produce from their vegetables, and yesterday someone gave me sprouted broccoli, I ate a cup raw today it was delicious, and today my neighbour gave me courgettes and a cauli and my singing teacher gave me pears. Nice hey?

Eats:
spinach and banana smoothie
cup of dried fruit
banana with seeds and cashew nut butter
cup sprouting broc
cup of dates
courgette pasta and tomato sauce


Arrow xxx

16/2

Ok so this is caffeine detox. Thank God I'm doing it! If it makes your body feel this bad when you quit it can't be doing any good. It's also a bit of a shame that I have to take a chunk of time out to deal with this, headache, weakness, even nausea. And that's just a pint of green tea per day!

That's it, I'll come clean, I had a fair size slug of gin and tonic last night at music night! Suffering today. Thought it would be better for me than wine but truly the answer is to not drink, because I am irritated with myself that today was unproductive in terms of goals. I realise it sounds obvious but this is no different that going out to a buffet like I did the other day, and sticking to raw. I was waitin til I could afford to replace it with a raw chocolate maca deal but that's not going to happen any time soon because of finances so I'll take a slug of carrot juice with me. Feel good about this decision, it's kind of ruining my weekends. These guys play music to unwind and drink. I have different goals in mind and I've set myself out to achieve a lot of stuff.

Arrow xxx

17/2

Doing a lot better today! Headache in the morning which returned slightly in the evening, and still spacey, but the boys were with Daddy so I relaxed by preparing flax seed crackers and listening to raw vegan radio. Felt great for a little while there in the afternoon. Cravings for cooked have definitely lessened but impact of this lifestyle change, although too early to tell, are muted this trial around, by high fat content in my diet and not doing the daily hour of walking.
banana and spinach smoothie
Made a delicious new salad dressing with parsley, capers, water, red wine vinegar ( out of balsamic ) and dried basil. ( Thanks again, Jodi ) Amazing. Added cucumber, avocado and walnuts. It really was nice and unusual tasting. Looking forward to more of that tomorrow.
Pint carrot juice with ginger and lemon. Yum
avocado
4 coconut and carrot macaroons
Not sure what else...all raw though

Arrow xxx

18/2

So I've put on weight round my stomach again, I've been eating a lots of avocados! After the caffeine leaves my system, I'm going to have a closer look at my diet, but for now I feel weak and tired still, and a bit low and grumpy this is all going on so long, but I know that this will pass in time. I have never stopped having caffeine so this is a new thing for me. Came up in a mouth ulcer on Sunday with is slowly going and a spot today.

Eats
amazing flax seed crackers - too many, made them Sunday with ground pumpkin and sunflower seeds and tomato, bell pepper, garlic, onion and courgette powder. So delicious!
spinach and banana smoothie
3 nectarines
salad with the parsley dressing and a few nuts.
4 or 5 coconut and carrot macaroons dehydrated

Arrow xxx

19/2

Another day raw. Still grumpy from feeling fatigue, not energy and I am absolutely sure the caffeine detox is the culprit, surprised as I am. Headachy this evening. Still, kept it low on the physical stuff today and sat on the sofa and read my book for book club (in tears several times, it's a good one 'Like Water for Chocolate'), made out and sent my invites for my charity music night which finally seems to be coming together, did 3 more chapters of my book review for my life coaching course, and got the boys to help me tidy up at lunchtime, which is my diversion tactic for stroppy tired boys home for lunch. Feeling weak in the evening, boys played outside with their french friends and I had a chat with their mum which is always good as it puts my french to the test. I feel such a lemon and quite ashamed of myself when I didn't think to put her little boys t-shirt on that he had stripped off to be naughty. It looked bad and I got the feeling as she wasn't nearby, that she didn't appreciate it. I am probably overreacting. Archie tested my patience again with a 45 minute wait in the bedroom til he fell asleep (yes, I stay in with them, it's a long story, but I am planning to go out of the room at some stage). Luckily I stick my ipod on and learn french.
My time of the month never came, like last time I went raw which was the first time I've not been regular, since ever. Bizarre, wonder why? Grumpy enough.
Another lesion type thing not quite an ulcer came up really large in the inside of my mouth today, but has gone down a bit now. Honestly, if I hadn't experienced the raw benefits of last time I would be sneaking in cooked by now. Luckily I'm being thoroughly stubborn this time round.

Eats
the usual. see, I AM grumpy.

Arrow xxx

20/2

Ooh, feeling better, oh yes definitely better. I had loads of apples around 11, as many as I could eat following the usual banana and spinach smoothie for breakfast then around 1pm I had what can only be described as a surprisingly delicious cauliflower soup with cucumber, avocado, lemon, courgette and ground sunflower seeds in there. 2 bowls later I took the boys to the pool and I have got to say felt the most calm and mellow with sense of well-being I have felt in a very very long time. Finally, arriving!!!!!
To cap it I threw out the boys biscuits and pain au chocolates and flavoured drinks this evening following a completely successful sugar free day.Yesterday, after being pummelled at and screamed at by my four year old I decided and told him that he wouldn't get any more biscuits period. I followed through today with amazing results. My boys, usually wired at bedtimes went to bed without a peep and absolutely no tantrums or flying off the handle from my older one which he does very frequently, all day. Instead they had water throughout the day, Loads of apples, raisins, steamed courgettes, flax seed crackers, carrot and coconut macaroons and (on raw fishfingers). In addition Archie ate half a cucumber. I can't say they were perfect but they were 100% different in their reactions. This is momentous. Too long I have been under my ex's spell who called me a b***h for not giving my oldest son chocolate when he was one. Now it's time to call the shots on behalf of their behaviour which can often be uncontrollable and more scarily and seriously their health which society turns a blind eye towards.



Arrow xxx

21/2

Despite a very disturbed night with the boys I had a good day, although felt a little spacey and emotional. Felt I had a cold when I got up but it quickly cleared.This afternoon I went on a 1 1/2 hr hike with two friends and had a lovely time. I went to book group this evening, went to the expense of a babysitter and everything. It was such fun, I love book club.'Like Water for Chocolate'. And the boys didn't cry and were little angels for her and were asleep when I got back, so all in all a good day. Again my boys are on no biscuits, just water and for lunch they had a bowl of raw sweetcorn before anything else.

Eats
spinach and banana smoothie
I cant remember what else, how rubbish is that, lots of apple and cucumber, dried apricots, olives. A real mish mash today of picky bits as I just wasn't very hungry...but I did have a large glass of wine this evening however which was naughty but nice. Like I say that's on my list of can haves and its pretty infrequent so I don't consider it an issue. If I had a cheese toastie that would be a great issue for me but not an occasional drop of alcohol, at this stage anyway.

Arrow xxx

Arrow-

I don't think a glass of wine is a bad thing -- I think it is yummy! I think you are doing a great job -- keep it up! I love reading your posts!

sounds like you are adjusting very well with the children. Good for you to clean up their diet. I went through crazy times so many years ago when I was raising my two children as a single mother and their father actually testified in court how awful I was for not feeding my children sugar and he felt compelled to feed them as much sugar as he could when he had them on his weekend. What a crazy time that was. That was in the early 1980's and I would get them back sometimes literly covered in sugary goo.
I am wondering how you made the soup it sounds tasty.
Keep up the progress I love reading about you
Pam

22/2

Thankyou so much for your encouraging posts Sundancer and Pam Pam, I love that you enjoy reading my posts. Must be the ego in me. It does spur me on though.

I think my ex is stuck in the 80's too. I hope one day I can look back and think how far I've come...away from him and with movement on in my life. Interesting to hear you've had the same, although worse by the sounds of it. I am so glad I've made the changes to my life and in the boys diet.I've never know them calm before or me actually, as this diet has started to shift gears into feeling the postives more and more each day. I fed the boys nectarines, banana chips, raisins, snow peas and raw carrots today equally with cheese sandwiches in wholemeal bread. I've stopped giving them meat except for once or perhaps twice week, they don't miss it and don't actually seem to like it very much. I should mention at this point that most of my cravings for meat and cooked have disappeared. Archie went to the freezer and pulled out chocolate icecream, I didn't even know it was still in there so I refused him but gave him a nectarine. The icecream is going in the bin. I cut up nectarines for them and put them in a bowl and Archie had a tantrum and threw them in the bin. Later I sat with them and started eating a whole nectarine and very shortly the boys and I had finished it and Archie asked for two more!
I have sprouted buckwheat for the first time and making a pizza base tonight, so that's rather exciting for me. I cannot afford macadamias for seed cheese at the moment but am looking forward to imagining the whole enchilada and trying different toppings on anyhow. My neightbour gave me 'bettaraves' from her garden which I looked up because I've never seen them before and I have collard greens! very similar to kale, which I can't find in France, so I am going to do a collard green salad tomorrow with all this massaging business. The stems also taste good raw if you peel down the fibrous bits which are a bit like on a celery stick.
Music night tonight. We were all on good form and it made me forget all my problems. Must get some sleep though, it's 2am now.

Eats:
spinach and banana smoothie
avocado
4 nectarines
half cup olives
cup dried fruit
cuople carrots
2/3rs carrot juice
Pint vegetable juice

The cauliflower soup I mentioned, which I am going to do again is from the kevingianni show. So good, not strong, refreshing! There's another one with dill though that I'd like to try.

Arrow xxx

24/2

This is my posting for yesterday which was a horrible day in that I had a violent reaction to the 3 glasses of wine I drank at music night. It was a rose and it was horrid tasting but Gil, the owner pours it for free as we are sharing the music evening with him. I didn't feel too bad at the time but was sick on the pavement in town following a meeting with a friend in a hot bar with strong perfume. No offense, the perfume smelled lovely on her but it just got too much and people were smoking, and I only got 5 hours sleep so went home but had to stop to be sick again and the drive felt very very long ( an hour and a half)
SO thierin lies the lesson! I am taking a bottle of organic wine next week to share as I obviously am not quite prepared to give up wine at this stage!
My pizza base was too seet - I added too much agave so I ate it as it was and have called it a bisuit. It tastes rather like a digestive. So happy I've discovered sprouting buckwheat!

Arrow xxx

hehe the lessons we learn huh? i find im really sensitive to smells like strong synthetic perfumes now whereas a few years ago they didnt really bother me too much

well with the wine, smoke and perfume , no wonder ya got sick lol sensory overload !

make sure you keep mental notes with your food experiments , i find almost every raw recipie i make i have to tweak it to my taste

...Jodi, the banana eating buddhist

25/2

Well I finally got my time of the month, mentioning primarily out of raw interest, in that I was about 10 days late, unheard of in my regular cycle world, although I didn't have one last time I went raw either, just a bit of spotting then nada. I am sorry to be a bit graphic, but it's interesting isn't it how a diet change affects something which I thought was a permanent bodily function. So, on the other hand the other day I was thinking I don't feel like the same person anymore due to my intense feelings for any given situation and quick recovery from emotional setbacks; it's true I'm under a lot of stress at the moment with trying to get a business up and running to earn a living to move out of the marital home. So a lot of my feelings are emotional fall out from the separation and the new circumstances we are all adapting to. I feel different though. I feel. Then I think. I'm finding life brighter and more interesting. I caved in at this point before, but I haven't done that this time. Still feeling somewhat rough after yesterday.

Eats
collard and garlic salad. Sorry, yuck, gave me a headache, and loads of energy, body felt suffused with energy, so will definitel give it a shot agzin minus the smaller veins I left in.
the rest of the usual. Tried to make another cauli soup and tried a variation which ended up washed away in the sink.

26/2

Thanks for the tips about keeping mental notes on the food front, Jodie. I know, what a complete nuisance on the wine front, affected my whole weekend. So strong, the perfume!
With regards the pizza crust I thought I'd do the same crust add more agave and ginger and cinammon and make gingerbread men for the children! I think they will like them as they now know biscuits are a no no.
I am going to have to look into how I can help manage the boys behaviour better.
another raw day. Courgette pasta and tomato sausct today for tea. Olives. Pineapple. Sorry can't remember anything else. The next raw month may well be tougher for me as I get 'used ' to being raw.

Arrow xxx

oh please be as graphic as you want we talk about all sorts of things from poo to pee and blood and whatever lol

its your diary .. run with it honestly i dont think anyone who posts here regularly will be offended lol

i love celebrating our successes with you and giving you a shoulder to hug when you need it

you are doing great hun keep up the good work

...Jodi, the banana eating buddhist

keep up the great work, it sounds like your doing real good, especially with the children. I discovered I could'nt drink any alcoholic drink it really messed with my insides in a bad way. I don't even miss it but I still have the coffee I know I have to give it up but just not ready yet.
pam

27/2

Thankyou Jodi and Pam you are really encouraging xxx Well I could get graphic about the poo too, but suffice to say for the first 3 weeks I felt constantly constipated. Now I'm ok and my poos are light and fluffly and I feel like most of it is out of my system. ;-) so that's all good.
Yep it's really good to get the children on board with the healthy eating. It's been such an easy transition probably because they are so young. Archie doesn't like meat or bread and he loves greens so he's not a problem, Max has a brief tantrum and then, as today, tucked into a big bowl of green beans saying 'yum, I love hot green beans' It makes me feel so happy to hear that because I know his little body is crying out for good stuff. I just make a point of giving them as much fruit or greens as possible before moving on to some cheese say. Snacks are raisins and dates. I am looking forward to buying them more sweetcorn and mange tout, they love those raw. I wonder, after this last week, whether the goal of having them all raw at home is actually tangible. Let me get down this path a bit more, maybe wishful thinking.
Great news on the job front! I have secured a 3 day a week job as a mothers help in Geneva. It means not seeing my little one friday nights or sunday nights for a while which I will hate, but I have 10€ left and that's it then. There's no turning back. I have to start climbing out of this situation. Being getting a few dizzy spells today so ate quite a bit and drank lots. The last few days or so I haven't felt very hungry strangely which is a first since I started this diet, at least my cravings for cooked, told me I was hungry. Rested and slept in the afternoon as felt a bit detoxy, feeling a little skin crawly. A rare treat.

Eats

2 bowls of courgette pasta with tomato sauce
avocado
plums maybe 10, small
orange
apple
banana with sunflower seeds and cashew butter
cup of dried fruit
1/3 cup walnuts

Arrow xxx

32/2

It's been 5 days since my last post. My phone and internet connection got cut off because there's been some delays in transferring over debits to the ex's new sole account. It's still cut, I haven' had the funds to pay it. I'm at a friends giving a raw update.

Still rawing. Here's the news. I caught a cold but it's gone within 3 days. I drank loads of water and had a lot of fruit and it went really quickly. I feel headachey today because I just ate a ton of salty olives. It will pass though.

I was really shocked when I got on the scales at my friends house - I don't have any - I knew had lost weight but I am the lightest I've ever been, I'm 5ft 6" and now weigh 8 3/4 stone. I've never been under 9 stone. Consistently 9 1/2 stone for many years. The downside is I have loose flesh particulary on my stomach and am needing to get toned as I feel Like I am losing muscle too. I am a bit worried about getting any skinnier because I think people will consider me unhealthy looking and I want to promote this lifestyle to people, not put them off. Anyway with all this is mind I am joining a gym to do weights to bulk up as of next week, following the start of my new job and some income coming in and I am sure it will do me good to build strength and get toned. I'll let you know how the weight goes. Time I kept a bit of an eye on it. I've been trying to maintain weight with lots of avocados this time round!

My neighbour keeps giving my boys chocolate and lollipops.Talk about a difficult lifestyle change on all angles.She's been so incredibly kind regarding my situation but is easily offended, but I must say something next time she gives the boys something before their tea or they just won't eat. Still not giving them biscuits. My gingerbread men weren't a success as I hadn't realised the carrot pulp had gone off a little bit, so I had a little taste while dehydrating then the whole lot went in the bin.

I made cauli soup again but it wasn't as good with sprouted sunflower seeds (before I just ground up sunflower seeds) or maybe it was the pith of the lemon, it was bitter.

I made tamari flax seed crackers and they were so delicious, although not strictly raw of course. Now I have a little more money to live on I am going to start buying some organic and certainy get a water thing one of those brita things.

Hope you are all well.

Arrow xxx

33/2

I want to tell you what happened following the quick clear up of my cold which has been a few days of amazing energy. I had a lot less food due to finances and ate a lot more fruit than usual and drank lots of honey and lemon and hot water. Suddenly, despite 5 hours sleep last night I can complete a full day without resorting to a nap or getting irritable with the boys. I had a spring in my step when I went on my nordic walk and did all the housework tidying this morning despite lack of sleep. Didn't really feel the lack of sleep which is so unusual for me. I don't know, hope it continues. I forgot to mention my slip ups, the first so far. At the weekend on my new job I had a cappacino and an expresso. The cappacino I have to say, was delicious, but the expresso just made me feel jumpy for half an hour and tasted bitter. I think it might be time to experiment with nut milk drink. Now I have some income I will be ordering some nuts and cacoa beans from the internet. I have not been really keeping track of what I eat recently, but it is starting to involve more fruit quantities. Everything tastes different at the moment and I don't know why, like my sense of taste has sharpened. I don't know about joining a gym. Might go with yoga instead to tone, it's more me although it's hard to find the time.

Arrow xxx

34/2

return of the cold and tiredness. Have been tempted by cooked today, not quite sure how I resisted the boys left over sandwiches. Seem to have been hungry all day - out of flax seed crackers, ate loads of dried fruit but it didn't really hit the spot. I think I have not been resting enough and the weekend is catching up with me. Today was so busy at the bank twice sorting out a new account, friend for coffee this morning. Feeling overwhelmed as I don't have a weekend to straighten out the house now. Despite the cold my legs feel stronger, I still feel like I have more energy. It is weird having a mind that seems mentally active most of the time. No zoning out on pizza. I miss it today but I am determined to make it to 100 days. If the benefits continue to grow then I will commit for another three months with an added element, not quite sure what yet. Avocado, hazlenuts and bell pepper for supper.

Arrow xxx

35/2
Loads better today. Up at 6.30am and bed gone midnight. On the go all the time, busy busy. UNHEARD of. Never had that energy before, ever, ever, ever. Extremely calm with the boys. NEW me! Don't recognise myself. Spot on my chin (never get them) and coldsore again. Detox! Had organic plums today. MAybe 8. Delicious. Organic olives, ditto, with no headache.

Arrow xxx

36/2

I went to bed last night after midnight and was up at 7am, tired but with no usual irritability with the fatigue. Calm with my boys. They are starting to respond to me differently, of course, in a good way. Say like they are jumping off the fireplace for the fourth time I am really calm putting them on the naughty step and it has worked wonders me not getting cross. They know me cross too well. I want to be one of those mummies who is still playing tennis with my boys when they are 10 and I am 50 years. I want to take them hiking and all sorts. Had to get ready for work, have a bath and hairwash, and get my boys off to school then drive down to Geneva ( hour and a half ) for work. Tired but no problemo. This kind of energy is unknown to me. I was discussing it with a friend and she reminded me that I was always one for taking naps. Not now. I don't know myself with the boys. I just feel so calm. My physical reactions have speeded up, so searching for things in the house and tidying up is faster and my mental activity has speeded up too. I suspect the advantages felt so far will be increased greatly when I start daily exercise again and switch to organic. I've just noticed that it's 2 nights I've been up past midnight in a row. The quality of my sleep seems different and I need less? Magnifico, keep it coming :-) Temptations are still there however.

Arrow xxx