What she said! ;}

Just do the best that you can, sweetie. Eat as much raw as you can, as well as you can, and don't sweat the rest for now; it's not worth it to get stressed out over that right now. When you have such a lot on your plate to deal with, something may have to give for a while while you work on your emotional /mental body - cut yourself some slack, focus on the good and on what you have (been capable of) accomplished (accomplishing) up to this point, okay? This is the time to be as loving and understanding to yourself as you wish others would be to you...

Love you much and wish you only the best...

at least your still trying, right? Take it easy on yourself it sounds like you are going through some real stresfull times. Sometimes taking a long shower or bath helps or even deep breathing for a couple of minutes would help with copeing with stress.
I wish you the best
Love pam

This morning I made a blended fruit drink with some strawberries, banana, red leaf lettuce and a small piece celery. Have since had a few oranges, a sapote, and a pear and the smallest simplest salad. I'm glum.

Not in stress though, even though things are a little rough to the eye: all is well. The main difficulty in life is this struggle with my bad habits.

I am releasing a lot of gas. I am bloated and uncomfortable with the added weight which again is where it always goes....lower abdomen. It is throwing my back out. This is so ridiculous and this penalty of an inability to control myself is felt uncomfortably by me on a few levels -- and seen by all..
So, here I am again. Starting over, again. *(#&(#&%$@#!!!!!!

It absolutely completely thoroughly flabergasts me that people can live "purely"..eating right and not smoking, not drinking coffee. It seems IMPOSSIBLE to me. And "knowing better" and "believing" better and having a solid strong "conviction" doesn't mean @#$%&. It feels hopeless to me. If I am conscious it seems I have to shovel poisons down my throat, no matter what I know, believe, have experienced, etc ad nauseum. *%!@!

Otherwise I am fine.

I just am still in this boxing ring and the fight isn't over. I'm back up. Mad, but on my feet.

Maybe I should wear boxing gloves...would restrict the hand to mouth exercises I indulge in.

I could eat a 7/11 but I am going to make some vegetable juice.

i know its hard to make sense of but you cant forget the HUGE addiction some of these things are ...

proccessed food makers know this .. DEPEND on this to make their big bucks on cheap addicting crap

tobacco too .. i know i was a smoker for nearly 18 years

even tho you know better or believe better addiction is a huge thing to get over and it takes alot of time

by the way i worked at a 7/11 food kitchen making the food for the stores .. trust me ya dont wannna eat that stuff i wont horrify you with the details but lets just say the food handling is horrible lol

...Jodi, the banana eating buddhist

Hi Elakti,

>It absolutely completely thoroughly flabergasts me that people can live "purely"..eating right and not smoking, not drinking coffee. It seems IMPOSSIBLE to me<

Listen, sweetie, for every 2 raw fooder who's a 'dietary saint' there are 10 or 15 of us who are as imperfect as all get out. Do you know, I drink a third to a half of a cup of coffee every morning when I make my husband's coffee? I just can't help myself right now. And I still eat some cooked food, quite often in fact. I'm done with hiding my 'infractions;' I think the whole thing is nuts. :-p I've been into the raw food diet since the mid-1980s, and it's been wonderful, but I take the '100%' thing with a grain of salt. (Well, that's not true; actually, salt is one item I won't eat because it makes me really bloated, lol!)

I totally empathize with you; it's HARD TO DO, especially in the winter. It's only recently that I've been able to stop beating up on myself about these issues -- emotional eating, eating cooked food in the evening some of the time, etc. And the weird thing is that now that I've been able to let up on myself, I'm able to eat raw food a lot more consistently. Classic catch-22.

I think you're doing GREAT! Give yourself a pat on the back, and keep on keeping on.

Oh-- and one practical bit of advice (you may already be doing this) that really helps me to stay raw: make sure you eat every 3 hours or less, especially in the afternoon, and if you go out somewhere, be sure to pack some raw food or some juice or at least dried fruit so you don't get sidetracked and then blindsided by the sudden need to eat, which often leads us to processed or cooked food if we're not someplace where we can get fruit, juice or salad.

<<<<<<<<<<<< huuuuuuuuuugggggggggggssss >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Sharrhan:


[www.facebook.com]

I think coffee is the hardest for me to quit, Coffee really messes me up in many ways but ai still want it and still drink it at times. I have family members who will make a pot and I can smell it all over the house. As for smoking I did quit that habit a year and a half ago. I am constantly reenforcing my desire to be a non smoker, everytime I see someone with a cig I give thanks that I am not smoking I will usually take a deep breath and say something to myself about how happy I am to not smoke. It gets better. I have not had a cup of coffee since the 4th of this month, I am juice fasting and I am sure the coffee would really evvect me with a empty stomach. I think one of the keys to change is to be positive, to turn wht you are doing into a positive. For example... I quit smoking and exchanged the habit of smoking to a habit of breathing deep. I did not feel as if I was taking something away. I think it gets hard when you feel you are takeing a pleasure away from yourself. When I want to eat some of the foods my family eat I tell myself that maybe later I can have a serving of that or maybe I could make it raw and still be satisfied and remind myself the reasons I am going raw (I get real forgetful)

You can do it your way.

Love Pam

> I think one of the keys to change is to be positive, to turn wht you are doing into a positive. For example... I quit smoking and exchanged the habit of smoking to a habit of breathing deep. I did not feel as if I was taking something away.<

Good tactic. I bought myself a box of gingerbread flavored Celestial Seasonings holiday tea yesterday; it's my new coffee substitute. You know, the funny thing is, after about an oz. of coffee, I can't stand the taste anyway! It smells great, and tastes great for a couple of sips, and then I usually have to take the rest (another oz. or so) to my husband and pour it in his coffee cup.

Yes, I've just decided: I'M NOT GONNA DRINK THAT STUFF ANY MORE! I quit for several months, go back to it, quit, go back... no more. My will power is bigger than a stupid cup of coffee.

Sharrhan:


[www.facebook.com]

P.S. Just tried the 'gingerbread' tea-- blahhhh. It was a waste of money. Back to green tea chai, my favorite, which is still much better than coffee for a morning perk.

Sharrhan:


[www.facebook.com]

Thanks everyone. Yes, that must be so, that there are so many strugglers to every "no look back" person. At least I know the right diet for me and am on right track. I just keep side railing, and it is biochemical and emotional. Gimme gimme gimme. And if I just had a flutter here and there that would be one thing, but I don't flutter, I dive. If I drink coffee, it is cups and cups and Cappucinos. If I eat candy, it is not a taste or a small portion, it is a mini binge. Etc. I go whole hog. Have always been that way. That is why, for example, for me 100% raw is best for me. I need to be fairly strict, really get into raw foods and leave all the rest behind. And, when I am there, it is great. So freeing, psycologically, what to say of the improved health and calm steady energy. Eating becomes so natural and simple and basic, uncontaminated with cravings and compulsions (except occasional detox cravings). I can trace this "fall" from eating some hard candies. At the Bikram studio they have little dish of them. One eve I thought, oh...just a little hard candy, a little piece....I can trace from there, from several pieces to.... Another time, I was happily raw and started eating some croutons on salad....those little pieces of bread started the avalanche.

Anyway. Today I ate pretty well. Fruit, small salad, blended fruit drink. Evening is approaching and I am sorry I can't have something gruesomely good/bad like a ----- or, well, never-mind. I'll get through the eve and will feel better tomorrow. I feel like getting in bed and reading. Celery would be nice and chompy chewey (also full of minerals etc).

Yeah, Jgunn, I get so mad at our food suppliers...what a hoax. I was thinking more of the candy counter, but any way, it's all the same...junk. I am a vegetarian, thank God, and that is set in stone. (since 16) I have that to be very very grateful for. And I quit drinking many many moons ago. See, I have that biochemical craziness. Why I HAVE TO BE 100% RAW. One crouton becomes a pizza. One hard candy becomes 7 hershey bars at one sitting. This is why I sometimes probably sound so intense. I'm not talking about a few spoons of rice or tofu and steamed vegetables, or even a taste of this or that. I'm either 100% raw or in the ditch.


Thanks for support everyone, it does mean a lot to me to read your posts and support and suggestions and ideas. It has its good effect. My celery snack will be more welcomed and appreciated.

Elakti Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Thanks everyone. Yes, that must be so, that there
> are so many strugglers to every "no look back"
> person. At least I know the right diet for me and
> am on right track. I just keep side railing, and
> it is biochemical and emotional. Gimme gimme
> gimme. And if I just had a flutter here and there
> that would be one thing, but I don't flutter, I
> dive. If I drink coffee, it is cups and cups and
> Cappucinos. If I eat candy, it is not a taste or
> a small portion, it is a mini binge. Etc. I go
> whole hog. Have always been that way. That is
> why, for example, for me 100% raw is best for me.
> I need to be fairly strict, really get into raw
> foods and leave all the rest behind. And, when I
> am there, it is great. So freeing,
> psycologically, what to say of the improved health
> and calm steady energy. Eating becomes so natural
> and simple and basic, uncontaminated with cravings
> and compulsions (except occasional detox
> cravings)...Why I HAVE TO BE 100% RAW. One crouton becomes a pizza. One hard >candy becomes 7 hershey bars at one sitting. This is why I sometimes probably >sound so intense. I'm not talking about a few spoons of rice or tofu and steamed >vegetables, or even a taste of this or that. I'm either 100% raw or in the >ditch.


Ahhhhhh...NOW I get it. Wish you'd said this before (if you have, I missed it - sorry)! Now certain things you've said before and certain struggles you were having make much more sense now. I'm kind of like that sometimes myself, but it depends on waht I eat and how foul of a mood I'm in - like today. It really can be quite hard to deal with, so I can totally sympathise! Thanks for being so specific - it will help us to give you more targeted support...and many more {{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}} and best wishes...

I understand what you are saying with the eating thing, I can't stop with just one bite of cooked food either, I made a vegitarian lental soup for my daughter a while back and decided to have a small boul and ended up haveing two bouls and falling off the raw wagon. I am trying to figure out just what my problem is with that. I am looking up books about how we think and how to change. I have also figured out that I am posibly alergic to grains and that seems to trigger a bing for me, I end up eating buttered toast. Its crazy. Don't think your alone at this one.
PaM

Thanks Soraya and Pampam. I thought you'd known about my alcoholism and this biochemical/mental/whatever thing I am plagued with. All I have to do is taste something once and if it affects my biochemistry, blood, brain ---well, my goose is cooked, so to speak. My good fortune is that I have a very strong inner drive for healing and winning this game. I cannot give up, no matter how hopeless it seems. Actually, I have done a lot. I quit drinking, drugs (not that big a deal, the drugs, they were just adjunct to alcohol). And I have periods of rawfoodism and periods of no smoking. I want so badly to do without these negative habits, etc. How I would love to eat good food only, not smoke, not be addicted to coffee. Wow, who would that be?

I did a little better for a day or two and yesterday could not resist...was at store but instead of just buying some produce, I bought some other stuff....

I feel like Sisyphus, however his name is spelled...the dude who had to keep carrying that same 'ole same 'ole boulder back up the mountain. I seem to be fighting against gravity and that boulder just gets heavier and heavier!

I'm not giving up.

hey i got this in my email today ...might be worth checking out i figure if i get ONE tip out of it to get past the holidays its worth it LOL !!

Dear jgunn,

The holiday season is almost
here. This can be a tough time
of year for us healthy eaters!

There are many food temptations,
especially at Thanksgiving dinner.
It can be difficult dealing with
relatives who don't understand why we
eat raw foods.

I am usually the only person at
Thanksgiving dinner who eats raw
vegan. Others at the table are
always trying to get me to eat
turkey and stuffing.

I used to struggle through the holidays.
I would try my hardest to stick with raw
foods, but I would always cave in and
overeat unhealthy foods like cookies,
mashed potatoes, and tofu turkey.

My friend Dr. Ritamarie Loscalzo has been
teaching natural health and nutrition for
two decades. She specializes in raw foods
and has created a new program to help us
through the holidays.

It is called Holiday Thrival, and is designed
to help us not only survive, but Thrive! Yes,
it is still possible to create vibrant health
through the holiday season!

I will be hosting a new teleseminar
class with Dr. Ritamarie next Wednesday,
November 19. We will be giving you the
specific raw food strategies and techniques
we are using to thrive during the holidays.

During this teleseminar, we will answer
all your questions related to raw food
nutrition, and we will also share some
of our favorite Thanksgiving recipes.

Dr. Ritamarie has a brand new recipe
eBook filled with delicious raw gourmet
Thanksgiving recipes. She has new recipes
for many traditional dishes including
pumpkin pie, cranberry relish, and Herbed
Mashed "Potatoes" with Mushroom Gravy.

You are invited to join us during this
special event. To register, please visit
the following page for more details:

[www.therawdiet.com]

We are hosting this class because we want
to help you achieve all your nutritional
goals. You will create vibrant health and
experience unlimited energy with these
proven nutritional strategies and techniques.

Thanks and please let me know if you have
any questions. I look forward to speaking
with you on Wednesday!

To your great health,

Mike Snyder

P.S. This is a free event and there is
no charge. Please register even if you
are unable to make the live event, and
I will email you a recording of the class.

Sign up today at

[www.therawdiet.com]

Mike Snyder

5803 SE 83rd Ave.
Portland, OR
97266
US

Thanks JGunn for thinking about me. I don't really need holiday survival though. I know what to do. It's easy.

I'm working on it all. I will only post again when I am really on rawfood path again. Will probably start anew with Renewal of Rawfoodism Volume II. Soon, I hope! Today is day two without cigarettes. I'm up against the wall...so sick from it, I HAVE to. Wish me strength of will. Food will probably go haywire (moreso). We shall see. This body seems to rule me. I am concentrating on my higher conscience. My lower mind, senses, body are all involved in some kind of heavy long drawn-out drama and I'm sick of the rucus and the fighting and the 'she did it!', "No, she did it", "No, it's her fault" ----I'm probably not making myself clear. I'm so entrenched in these battles of cigarettes, and coffee, and dough, and butter, and sweets, and *)^#*& up biochemistry and cravings and balancing acts (not real balance, but needed biochemical antidotes for the antidotes for the antidotes). Oh, anyway, I need to just STOP all this. We'll see. I'm working on it, and I'm going to work really hard and DO it. I have to rise above the rucus and battlefield. Sounds heroic. It will be.

We'll see what happens.

Struggle seems to be the event of the month around here -- I know I'm there too. Hang in there and know we're here whether you are "doing great" or not. Just keep doing your best at the time --that's all you can ask of yourself. Chin up!!

Yes, Chin up. Very good advice. Thanks, Sundancer. And, I recently read about your family's health problems and I'm sorry I didn't see sooner to wish you well with these challenges. I wish strength and wellmess and recovery to them. Take care of yourself, too.

Thanks, Elakti. We still don't know if my oldest daughter has cancer again, but she is scheduled for surgery on the 9th for her gall bladder and hernias.

Elakti, Sundancer--
Sending you both lots of love.

Sharrhan:


[www.facebook.com]

Sending you ALL lots of love, strength and peace!

Thanks, guys!

I had to pop in to check on my women...miss Elakti a lot and wish we could see her - I wish you nothing but the best and hope we hear from you soon, dear!

Sundancer, I hope you are doing as well as possible and holding on strong; nothing but love for ya!

Kwan, my purple angel, good to see you as always!

Jgunn, Pampam, thanks for giving "my girls" your beautiful and welcome support!

I'm not around a lot but you are always in my thoughts...

Have a blessed week, guys!

Hey Soraya; what's up buddy??? I'm doing okay, have a kinda bad cold and plan to fast a little (good little incentive here -- I'm not really hungry and detoxing -- this is a good thing and I am thankful because my will power has been nonexistent lately). My job still sucks, but hey, I have a job, so I can't complain too much about that. My older daughter is facing a few surgeries, so I'm looking at a trip to California soon to help with the grandbabies (don't know how I'm going to pay for it though!). I'm doing a little art -- have a show on Saturday. I'm about 60-75% raw right now but with this fast, I'm thinking it'll help me get back to 100%, which I was planning to do in December anyway but already blew it yesterday and Monday -- oh, well!

Yeah, Elakti, where are you? We miss you!

We have a good little group here, huh, guys?!

Kwan -- I'm gonna PM you.

Peace.

Sundancer,
So sorry to hear about your daughter; hope everything works out for both of you.
That's wonderful, though, about your art show. Are you doing a gallery show?

***Doing the funky dance of joy***

Sundancer!!!!

Man, I wish I could hug ya, woman!

I hope you feel better soon and I'll probably be doing some fasting of my own soon... feel clogged up on just about every level with stagnant energy and stress and its upsetting my system, so I'll give it a break...

You and Elakti have been in my heart and prayers, and your family as well; the money for the trip will come, and I wish her speedy, complete healing. When I was in critical condition a few years ago at an ICU here my Mom had to worry about getting an emergency visa (doesn't live in the States) AND finding money to come here, plus finding a place to stay. She got the visa in no time flat (hosp. sent a "Her only child is in need of her mother NOW" - plus all the medical stuff -fax to the embassy over there); she "happened" to meet an old friend she hadn't seen in ages and he told her to meet him again in a couple of hours and handed her a plane ticket, and it turned out one of the employees at the hosp. had worked with my mom years ago and arranged for her to come spend two weeks with his parents. Phew!!! Just felt the need to share that; hang in there, all will work out for the best...

Hurray on the Art show! Congratulations - hope it is a stunning success!

Have a phenomenal day, guys!

Thanks, guys! The show is in a gallery, but it is just for the weekend and actually more like an arts and crafts show. I'm hoping to meet the gallery owner because he doesn't do a lot with the gallery in general, and I have some great gallery experience from college and a lot of ideas. The building is an old marble bank building with a TON of potential for being really polished and beautiful. I'm doing some small stuff that I'm selling reasonably, and my hubby is doing some photography. Hopefully I'll make some money towards the California trip fund. And... I'll post some of my work as soon as I shoot some (probably tomorrow).

Soraya -- thanks for sharing that about your mom. It is encouraging and I know I'll get there if and when I really need to be there.

Soraya--
I love the experiences you shared about how the path was opened for your mom to come to the States and be with you when you needed her. Wonderful!

Sundancer--
I tried to send you a PM, but your inbox was full. Talk to you soon!

Sharrhan:


[www.facebook.com]

Whewww....it has been about a month since I posted since I have been all this time very OFF TRACK, de-railed, cooked, junked, breaded, covered in chocolate, and yesterday I even had a pepsi (wow) and was up all night long and since I was awake anyway (found some ok movies on tv) I also ate and ate. This is the confession part. I feel ready to switch tracks. I hope I am.

I ate poorly today and took nap and woke up feeling like hell (as usual), my head cloudy and my tongue all swollen, and etcetera. I took a good look at myself in the mirror, at a distorted body, an ill look all over my face, in my eyes, and etcetera. I don't know if this is real or not (time will tell) but I felt an inner power surge, a shift.

I took a good thoroughish enema and then a good skin brushing and a nice welcoming bath. Then drank a lot of water, am still drinking, I am soooo thirsty. I feel better. I am clearing out refrigerator. I do have a lot of good greens and have bananas, persimmons, oranges, apples. I have carrots beets cucumbers. I have to shake hands with my juicer. This is not going to be easy, already at the moment my stomach is burning, so agitated and distressed. My blood sugar is undoubtedly super unbalanced. Oh, how my stomach hurts. It has been so insulted and that insult has permeated throughout system. I look so old, feel so old, tired. So, that's the picture.

Hopefully I'll be posting 'the journey back to the journey'! Please support me, anyone. I need it. This is so hard, I've been suffering with this fall-down for a while now and my stomach is telling me the gastric pain I'm in for....hopefully it won't last long.

So, hello everyone again! And, look for me in a new renewed Renewal of Rawfoodism Vol. II.

Tonight I am going to read Art Baker's book on natural hygiene, the self-healing body. Such a tremendous book, and it will get the cheering section in my mind back on its feet back on course. I am going to make a nice banana persimmon blended drink with a couple of dates also.

>I have to shake hands with my juicer.<

lol :-p I've been there too from time to time, Elakti, feeling like I need to get re-acquainted with my juicer. We're behind you 100%, cheering you on!

Good to have you back! I haven't been a saint this month either, but never mind... we'll just press on.... er, trip lightly along the sunlight path.

I'm going to promise to back you up in my meditations. Maybe others will do the same.

>. I am going to make a nice banana persimmon blended drink<

Hey!, I had the same thing tonight! It was pretty good, wasn't it.

Sharrhan:


[www.facebook.com]

YYYIIIPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEE -- Elakti's back!!! I'm not doing great now either, but I just posted on Kwan's thread that I'm giving myself until Christmas to eat what I want, detox or fast the next week, then go 100% raw on the first of Jan. I like New year's resolutions because I like clean slates. So I hereby, officially declare your slate clean, too, girlfriend!!! Alakazam!!!

Thank you so much for your support, Kwan and Sundancer! Yes, this is a difficult time (holidays). I am invited to someone's house on Christmas (vegans) and I will eat whatever is there. So, I'm also considering this time as a cool down time and will really 'hit it' after Christmas day.

I did have the blended banana and persimmons and dates last eve and later made a nice salad, kind of fruity...spinach and romaine with a few grape tomatoes, a little apple, a few raisins, a lot of cucumber and even a couple olives. It tasted good.

So far today, I've done well. I ate fruit -- bananas, a persimmon, some raisins and a little apple. Lunch was a big salad with grated carrots, grated beets, spinach, romaine, tofu chunks.

There's something in the kitchen that is not good for me and I do have to honestly say I didn't throw it away and will probably eat it. I wish I were strong enough to flush it down the toilet where it belongs. Still, a definite improvement is happening.

Sundancer, maybe we can 'clean slate it' together after the holidays. You really want to do 100% raw? Sometimes it is helpful in buddy system. Maybe there will be a 100% raw thread started after the holidays...others might want to clean their 2008 slates and palates, especially right after the holidays. Me, I've been in "Extreme Holiday" mode for too long, lol.

Later! Again, thanks for the support, kindness and no judgemental lectures...I know you understand. I may have a tough fight, but it isn't due to no faith. I KNOW raw fruit and greens is the way for me to eat. 2009 Time for Change Yes I can!!!

I am ignoring my juicer, still.