breathe in, breathe out.


hola!! i am definitely feeling a lot better today.

breakfast: 2 kiwis, nectarine, 2 bananas, glass of oj, gala apple, some almonds.

lunch: big salad with kale, spinich, red romaine lettuce, shredded carrot, 1 tomato, all in pine nut alfredo dressing. then some marinated mushrooms, 1 nectarine, 1 banana.

dinner: big bowl of tomato soup. MMMMMMMMM. then snacked on almonds, pecans, dates, and 2 kiwis.

goodnight.

I LOVE RAW FOOD !!!!

i love feeling awesome all the time. i try to get enough sleep of course, but sometimes on days when that is impossible, i love how i can still fully function and not even feel tired or bogged down during the day. i love feeling light and alive. i love feeling confident. i love how there is like 5 - 10lbs 'cooked difference' i call it lol. if i ever start to eat cooked low fat vegan food again, i put on like 7 lbs! but on raw it all comes off in a few days. i love feeling clear headed and clean inside. i lvoe being healthy and having the dentist tell me my problems are all going away. i love having to eat way less. having a couple kiwis and a couple bananas and feeling full. i love the flavors and the colors, so vibrant. i love how my nails are strong and my skin is clear. i love how i never ever get sick.

i love stopping by the grocery store every couple days for some fresh beneners, green on the tips, and i making awesome vegetable soups in my blender. so delicious!

i love the life that raw food lets me have.

i have noticed that after eating a meal of only fruit, either sweet fruit or avacado and tomato, or something like that, i feel warm inside. happy, calm, light, beautiful. i love this feeling. it's one of the best feelings in the world. i wish others that i know could feel this. i love fruit. when i eat mostly fruit, i see the cooked food, and even though it's still as appetizing to me as before, i don't really WANT it. i don't know why. i guess i just feel so satisfied with fruit and unlike eating greens or roots i never feel like my food could be better or like i need to add a ton of salt, oil, or sweetner to make it delicious. there is something about fruit that makes it pefectly satisfying on its own, and when i eat it i am never wishing i was eating something else. i am drawn to it.

sleeping in tomorrow!!

fruit, fruit, fruit!
it's weird to think that this time last year i was eating meat. i've only been a vegan for about 7 or 8 months, raw for 2 or 3 months. but i've pretty much been eating only fruit lately, with some nuts/seeds on the side. i am slowly weening away from them but sometimes at night when i get crazy impulses to want salty junk food i eat the nuts instead. i used to eat a lot of salty junk food, i think thats why. but anyhow !! this has all been moving along kind of fast for me i guess even though it feels like i have been raw since the dawn of time. it was like another life time ago. but i feel so good! and the fruit is so satisfying, since eating almost exclusively fruit, i find i don't really want cooked food anymore. the fruit just has like everything i want and it's so pretty and delicious. this was yesterday:

am: 2 kiwis, tall glass of fresh squeeze orange juice, banana

lunch: nectarine, tomato & avacado salad, some tomato soup.

dinner: juice from booster juice (pineapple, orange, banana) then i had a banana, a bunch of grapes, some almonds.

before bed: 2 kiwis, nectarine, banana, some pistachios, 2 tomatos/

i took this last christmas! lol.

BANANA COCONUT PUDDING.

1 coconut flesh and water
1 or 2 bananas
6 dates
teaspoon coconut butter

i just made this it was sooo tastey. i used the bananas with the green tips, i dont like any other kind! but i live up north and the coconuts i get are very mature so it might be a little different from one with a fresh coconut. i smell the meat that my family ate tonight and it's weird to me that people eat that. it smells like cooked flesh, with loads of salt, garlic, processed sauce. it smells so heavy. that's probably how it makes you feel. i hate heavy foods. i love feeling so vibrant.

i feel so much lately like seizing life. i realize now that even though in the past i have felt trapped, i am not. life is mine and it is in front of me placed in my hands to do with whatever i want. i am so free to think, feel, be anything whatever i want.


i had a dream last night about this person i used to know. it's weird how memories are so alive inside and you don't realize. certain memories, certain things i felt once will always be alive inside. there's nothing i can do to change that. i would say it haunts me, but i think i am the one chasing it.

it comes and then it goes. just once. like a flower that opens and closes.
then it's gone.

your posts and photos are beautiful!

so yeah, here i am, in the middle of a universe i know nothing about.

i'm glad i found this journal again! for awhile i had not been eating very many
raw things, that's probably why i stopped writing. to not remind myself! but
what is the day today? august 8th, the middle of the summer. i don't really
believe in tomorrow, so all i really have is today. today to embrace everything
i've ever wanted for myself or believed about the world. i love raw food. i
love veganism. i really wanna lose 7 lbs before my birthday !!

my blender broke a long time ago. i totally freaked out! and i have not bought
another one yet. but that's alright i don't need to. and i am not totally raw.
at least not yet? i don't know!! but that's what i ate for most of today.

let me find my way. let me feel your warm embrace.