I'm writing this in hopes it helps.

Today I just wanted to wring someones neck. I was on edge all day, feeling incredibly tense and wanting to say ef it all.

I'm a student employee and I sit at a desk most of the day. A couple of times I had to get up and pace the halls, manufacturing floor, nooks and crannies to help stem the edginess.

I would get something like a cold shiver that would travel throughout me on a couple of occasions.

I don't know if this all is some detox and tomorrow will be better or not. I've been raw for about 13 months.

All I've really wanted to do all day was go walk and not stop until things cooled down. The walking at worked helped.

Some of it I feel is stress related. All I get at work and school (or maybe it's just what I've been focusing on) is what I can't do. I'm feeling extremely limited.

I'm going to go get some exercise now.

david

I definitely think this situation of mine is related to too much fat intake. I did an experiment of day off and day on and I believe I noticed a difference, and what a difference!

david

I think it might be something more than just fats. I went back to school 2 years ago, and then: quit smoking, got into some trouble with alcohol, quit alcohol, quit caffeine, and then became a raw vegan from the absolute opposite. All this quitting took place over a year.

From what I'd read about raw veganims, mainly on the web, is be ready for priority changes and I think that is more the issue with me right now and it's hanging heavy on me now.
I've been raw for about 13 months, have had this explosion of vibrance that's hard for me to even describe to friends and family. These people have known me as a completely different person.

I've got to somehow explain that going to school right now just doesn't seem right. I've become extremely interested in backpacking, photography, writing and playing music, and I would like to get involved in an organization like WWOOF for awhile, basically get in touch with myself and planet earth.
I don't mind the idea of living in a tent for awhile.

I basically broke down in front of my mother today and told her that the current scenario I'm in is very difficult, very limiting, very unsatisfying. So, I'm going to see a counselor of some sorts tomorrow.

There is the possibility that I might be able to get involved in an organization such as WWOOF, but how do I stave off college bills for awhile? I feel stuck and I put myself there. I have all this energy and feel like I'm in a box.

david

I am feeling quite a bit better as of late, especially today. I ate quite a few cashews last night and I'm not sure if that has anything to do with.

I laid off cashews for several months after hearing they are hard to get raw and not a very natural food product, but that doesn't change the fact that I feel really well today.

david

I'm kinda interested in something, maybe many things.

Every once in awhile I smoke green stuff. It has been much less since I went raw

and I've noticed other things. It takes very little and I'm to the point where I am uncomfortable (no wonder I do it less and less all the time (a good thing for sure)) (so its regulated to special events)[but, there's much worse things in the world].

But, in the times that I do partake, I've noticed that I have a strong desire for grapes. I was wondering if this happens to be because of the detox power of grapes that I have read about on the grande Internet.

Does my body react like it wants to expel this toxin immediately? Or is that an obvious 'YES'.

david