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Parents Not Supportive
Posted by: Anonymous User ()
Date: April 05, 2008 06:59PM

My parents don't agree with the raw lifestyle. I've wanted to go raw for quite a while now, and when I finally worked up the courage to change my eating habits, they pretty much attacked me with how I was harming my body and how I was going to die soon. They always cook me food now and if I refuse to eat it, I will get lectured again and again. After going through 5 days with just raw foods, I felt great and so aware of the world around me. Now cooked foods are making me feel horrible and lethargic. How do I get my parents to agree with me and allow me to at least try going raw?

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Re: Parents Not Supportive
Posted by: rwillow76 ()
Date: April 05, 2008 11:08PM

How old are you anyway?



River

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Re: Parents Not Supportive
Posted by: Anonymous User ()
Date: April 06, 2008 12:16PM

15.

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Re: Parents Not Supportive
Posted by: Anonymous User ()
Date: April 06, 2008 09:59PM

Do you have any books on the subject?
Maybe encourage them to read alot about it.
Brian

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Re: Parents Not Supportive
Posted by: rawangel ()
Date: April 08, 2008 04:21PM

One option is to emancipate yourself at 16, but this is extreme and I'm sure you love your folks. The other option is to stay strong and try to demonostrate to your parents well you're doing. Over time they should begin to ease off a little when they see you're not sickly nor dying. :-) I like the idea of supplying them with literature and then walk away. They are probably working off their own programming about what is healthy or not and they're truly afraid you're harming yourself. The plus is they care. The minus is they don't get it.

I became a vegetarian when I was nine years old. Fortunately my Mom supported me, but the rest of my family, including my Dad, thought I was crazy. It was hard at times, but I knew I didn't want to eat meat and at least my Mom had my back. When I was 16, I became a vegan and that's when all hell broke lose. It seemed extreme to my family, even my dear Mom and it was harder to justify my diet to them. For most of my high school years I endured their questions and concerns. I did a lot of sneaking around eating my food, lol. Even my teenage buddies didn't get me, while they were eating sugar crap, I was eating salads. I was pretty isolated, but I remained strong. It's funny now to me as I think back about this time in my life, but it wasn't funny then. It's been a long time ago and I'm trying to remember how I coped...in order to share this with you. But I don't really remember specifics. I think sometimes I didn't cope to be honest, but you will get through it. Just hang in there and if you're forced to eat cooked food, I think that's the same as if your parents were pushing drugs on you. Try to sit them down when you feel it's the right time and talk to them about how you feel with your lifestyle. If they still aren't coming around, then there's really not a whole lot you can about it at this point as you're still a minor. Maybe have your raw foods when you're out of the house or in the privacy of your own space in your house. And eat small amounts of the food they insist you eat. I know it's probably very hard, but maybe choose to eat more vegetables and stuff like this. In three years, you can do whatever the heck you want and that's not that far away.

If it helps, I'm decades older than you and still come up against walls with my family regarding my diet. Evidence that people do not necessarily change and you have to do what is best for yourself. "To thy ownself be true"

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Re: Parents Not Supportive
Posted by: rawangel ()
Date: April 08, 2008 04:25PM

Oh I forgot to add there is a youth/teenager section on the raw raw food talk board. Check it out...rawfoodtalk.com. You will probably get better advice and support from your peers on this subject. Some of whom may be struggling with similar issues. I truly wish you well...stay strong.

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Re: Parents Not Supportive
Posted by: Context ()
Date: April 23, 2008 04:14AM

well... here is what I would do. Tell them that cooked food makes you sick, and that uncooked foods make you feel good. No one can argue with how you feel, and if they do... they are being controling. Tell them you dont like to be told how to feel... and keep on repeating it. And try not to label what you are doing around your parents as being "RAW". That gives your parents an issue to battle you on. They cannot force you to eat the way you do not want to eat... that is your choice. Most parents want thier kids to eat healthier... lol, I am suprised they are fighting you on this.

Or even tell them you want to try it out for a month... not permanent, just to see how you feel after. If your par

What you are doing is a good thing... while there are kids out there getting high and messing themselves up. Going raw should be the least of your parents worries. I think they are just being conformist, judgemental, and controlling. Just like my parents...

I remember my mother getting mad cause I wouldnt eat her food. She tried to guilt me into eating cooked food... as if i was doing her wrong. Then I used the same tactic on her.

"how come you are trying to force me to eat foods that I tell you hurt me..."
" why do you act like your a victim because I wont eat your cooked food, I didnt do anything to you."
"Why cant you accept me for who I am, as opposed to who you want me to be."
"Quit trying to tell me how to feel, I dont like it!" be forceful on this one, no one should ever tell you how to feel

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Re: Parents Not Supportive
Posted by: Prism ()
Date: April 24, 2008 03:34PM

Parents worry especially about their teen aged kids. Ask them to help you find some raw food books and raw food recipe books from the library and start with those. Ask them to read them also, as they can help to figure out the healthiest diet for you and also because they shop and do the 'cooking'..so put them in the picture so they can be part of your new lifestyle.

Try to eat plenty of fresh plant foods, don't skimp..ask for a big bowl for the fresh fruits you will eat thru-out the day, and ones you can grab on the way out the door. Have a supply of raw food bars too..and some dates, nuts, trail mixes, etc.

Eat like you have a big wood country table laden with all kinds of readily edible foods..no prep time involved except the shopping and displaying of items. You can find raw flaxseed crackers, raw nut butters, nuts and seeds, fresh fruits and veggies..tons of things.

Good luck and keep us informed on how it goes for you!

Love,
Prism

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Re: Parents Not Supportive
Posted by: sunshineTX ()
Date: April 24, 2008 11:12PM

I can relate to this (somewhat). I'm an adult, but my mother still likes to tell me that I need to eat something that will "stick to my ribs". She's diabetic, used to control it with diet, but now takes meds and eats pretty much what she wants. I don't think I need to take my dietary/health advice from her... smiling smiley

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Re: Parents Not Supportive
Date: May 02, 2008 05:06AM

i'm guessing you're a minor?

well... listen to them!! yes, its more healthy, but they are your parents, and for the time being you need to do what they say. maybe they arn't very informed on health and don't realize that they are more likely to die with the way they are eating than the way you want to eat, but all i can say is... wait till you're 18.

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Re: Parents Not Supportive
Posted by: frances ()
Date: May 02, 2008 06:05PM

Parents can't possibly argue with their kids wanting to eat salads, apples and bananas (at least I've never met ones that could). As soon as you say "raw food diet", though, it sounds like some kind of extreme and scary eating disorder. The best strategy depends a lot on who your parents are.

With my parents, I could convince them that the food does not become "healthier" when it is cooked. I could convince my mother that a salad was just as healthy as her vegetable stir-fry. (though that is the last thing she would want to hear right after cooking dinner!) If she still felt that I would suffer from lack of protein, meat, or dairy, that would be the bigger battle. You could try supplying the household with sprouted mung beans and soaked raw almonds ("See mom? There's protein in my salad!), homemade raw dressings, and nutritional research ("Did you know that although milk contains a lot of calcium it actually increases your dietary need for calcium?"winking smiley.

I didn't go raw while I was still in high school. I'm thirty now, and just went raw last year. It's amazing how much better I understand my parents now, than I did when I was younger. I think it's easier to relate to your parents once they don't rule your life anymore.

If you are making life easier on your parents, and not threatening your health or anyone else's, your parents should be thrilled at the change. With my parents, being willing to step up in the kitchen and help put food on table would, in their minds, give me the right to much a bigger say in what the family eats. The real challenge is convincing them that your diet is not a threat. If you do occasionally eat cooked food it might help. I've found that people who find a 100% raw food diet scary are not as bothered by a 95% or even 99% raw food diet. People (not just parents) are often hurt or insulted when you refuse to eat the food they've made. If you can gently encourage your family to have more raw dinners, that can help. Chef salad Wednesdays, for example, might go over well - especially if you're willing to do the work. If strips of cold cuts and cheese are available for those who want them, a salad begins to look like "real food" to meat-eating non-raw foodies.

When I'm trying to make the raw food diet sound less scary, some of the things I say are:
* I'm trying to include a lot more fresh fruits and vegetables in my diet.
* I'm avoiding sweets because they make me jumpy.
* The [XXX] are in season and I've been eating so many of them lately! Isn't fresh [XXX] so great?

Never claim to be on diet unless you actually look a little overweight!

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