I have a bit of a problem - I am to attend two wedding receptions this summer and I'm not sure what to do. I have been exclusively raw for more than two years. In my heart of hearts, I would be contented to stay away but that wouldn't work well for my wife (she isn't raw).

Some people have suggested to me that I just eat the cooked food and get back to raw on the next meal but I'm not prepared to do that. I see cooked food as an addictive agent and I'm not willing to risk it. In fact, I've made that mistake in the past and lost my resolve, returned to a cooked regime and struggled to get back to a 100% raw diet.


Have you ever had this problem? I'm looking for a creative solution.

there are degrees of cooked food. The worse ones are fried foods. Those will bring you down for sure. Second worse are baked. They could be ok in small portions. Then you got boiled and steamed. These two you will probably not find on weddings. Stay away from cakes, junk, etc. If there is nothing OK then don't eat anything.

Either bring your own food, or see if the host can accommodate your raw needs. Myself, I never expect people to make me raw dishes, unless it's simply some fresh fruit.

in most social situations
people are there to do a number of things
and achieve a plethora of aims

eating is usually at the bottom of the list ( actually)

because you can eat alone
you do not need to go to an event in order to be nutritionally nourished
hence, usually the aims of people at a social event

are very divergent but the very least is their concern of what YOU are eating

they are more concerned about making that connection, closing that deal, business networking, getting married lol etc.

if you are looking to get nourished in a superior fashion... DON'T

don't expect it... at all

the most they will lay out is a salad ( at best)

so, treat all social events as SOCIAL events not FOOD events

eat prior to the event and you can pick at the side salads that are provided

if it is a potluck, bring a big beautiful salad for all to share

this is just the reality

accept it early on and you will be fine

I've been to two weddings as a raw foodists. Both times the caterer gladly prepared me beautiful meals. If that wasn't an option, I'd bring my own or eat before. No biggie. Enjoy!!

Thanks everyone.

In listening to your thoughts, I think I need to contact the caterer and make arrangements in advance. I'd better get to it.

Typically, I always eat before I go out and as you say La Veronique, it's about the socializing, not the food. Actually my friends are very accommodating and try unusually hard to make sure I have enough to eat. They are more worried about it than I am. As you can understand, I decided a long time ago that I would make it my problem, not theirs.

I see myself as a crusader for the raw lifestyle and love to bring plenty of fresh food for everyone. It often becomes the topic of conversation and their enthusiasm runs high.

As an aside, have you ever observed that often children up to the age of 5 or 6 prefer raw food to cooked? At get-togethers, they often want what I'm eating rather than the usual cuisine being served.

Always best to bring your own food to events, so let them know in advance that you have special needs.

The mainstream living is not so easy when meals are served by other people. Recently l was performing a service for the yacht club, and for lunch they served up white bread (cooked) with meat and or cheese with wine, coffee or beer. No salad or water. Needless to say, l had nothing, but fortunately l am used to that so l had an early meal of green juice/sprouted seeds/seaweeds before lunch.

Don't go to family meals anymore, but that suits me because we are into different things. No-one minds. Personally, these days, l don't care for social eating, it's a very over rated social custom. To me, one must be silent at the dinner table and concentrate on the food and be greatful. Social eating fills the mind with distractions, so lets enter the eating room with a calm mind and digest that food properly.

Micheal Gerbonzi said he has given up social eating also. I hope more people catch onto this.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/22/2014 09:49PM by The Sproutarian Man.

Thanks Sproutarian Man. At this stage, I am thinking I will contact the caterer and offer to provide my meal.

I'm with you; I could do without the social eating scene. Not to be misunderstood, I do enjoy socializing but the whole food thing is such a nuisance.

I know this - if everyone ate a raw cuisine, there would be much less talking because they would be busy chewing!

raw4ever

<<Actually my friends are very accommodating and try unusually hard to make sure I have enough to eat. They are more worried about it than I am. As you can understand, I decided a long time ago that I would make it my problem, not theirs.>>

u got GREAT friends
good for you

!

They are all wonderful people. They appreciate my influence and love to talk to me about what it is I do. At work events, they make sure that I know there will be plenty of fresh fruits and veggies.

I have a burning enthusiasm for raw food. I talk about it everyday with whoever will listen. Perhaps they humour me but they tell me I'm their inspiration.

As you know, many people though they may not be prepared to go raw, are interested in pursuing a vegetarian diet and I encourage them in whatever ways I can. What I really try to do is persuade them to make at least 70% of their dietary choices as raw vegan food.

They are GREAT friends, to be sure.

Such great posts in this thread

It's true, the social events are too much focused on eating these days, and less on really getting together. I never understood why eating on social occassions is so important, it's basically just food.

I never give up on my raw vegan lifestyle, no matter where I go. I also don't care about what others say when I'm not eating the same food they are. When I'm at a social event, I either talk to the host before (if I'm in a good relation with that person) or I choose on the spot and request a salad with no oil/salt/spices/dressing (just plain chopped veggies). I also get a freshly squeezed juice (my fav is grapefruit/orange/apple/carrot), whatever kind they have, and make sure there's nothing added to it.

I recently went to a funeral and I just didn't eat anything because there was nothing raw. I just drank lots of water and had wonderful conversations with the people at my table (my friends from church).

I also went to a party in the memory of a lost dear one and the host (my friend from church) had lots of fruits available so I ate just that (she prepared a salad but she forgot I didn't eat oil/salt so she mixed it with oil/salt already, so no salad for me).

I would say that you should either eat before the event, or talk to the host, or just make sure you choose a salad and/or some fruit. And drink plenty of water. Especially at such events as weddings, people tend to focus more on the event itself and less on food.

I recently decided that I will no longer eat out or at some events because I no longer wish to put my health in somebody else's hands. I will just stick to drinking water when I'm out. I'd rather prepare my own food. On social occassions, food doesn't matter that much to me anyway.

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Raw vegan for life. Vegan for the animals. Raw for my health.

Ela2013, I am like you; I would do without food before I would compromise on my raw vegan lifestyle. The reason is that every time I have ever done so in the past, it was the beginning of my undoing and the ultimate price was too great.

I don't need food to enjoy the company of others and if it means not eating, that's fine too. My wife, who is not raw though she is a vegetarian, always worries what I will be eating but I don't because I am willing to go without food.

Thanks for bring forward the idea of drinking lots of water. It's a great filler and anyone is willing to provide it.

It's rather uncanny that you mention going to a funeral last week...I did too. The only difference between your account and my experience was that, to my surprise, there was a tray of fresh veggies...brocolli, cauliflower, carrots, pea pods and cherry tomatoes! Of course, I behaved myself and instead of taking the entire tray for myself as I would like to have done, I was reasonable and had a little.

Well, that's the problem at social events: they focus too much on non-vegan and non-raw foods that the raw vegan options are so little. Ever since I went raw vegan, I have always struggled with eating enough when going to restaurants or to social events. At social events I can't eat all the fruit in the house or I will be rude. At restaurants, the salads are so small that I would have to get more than 5 salads to make up for a decent raw vegan salad. And the choice for salad ingredients is so limited, while their freshness is questionable. Besides, the waiter doesn't always understand that I want a salad with no salt/no oil/no spices/no dressing so I have to tell him several times. Or the waiter refuses to bring me what I want, like it happened to me once when I wanted a certain amount of olives (I was eating olives back then) and he said "no, too many olives". Or when I wanted 2 apparently different salads and the waiter said they were actually basically the same so no need to order both. When I'm visiting my family, I have to buy food for myself because they don't understand how large my food portions must be, they still think that eating 3 bananas in one sitting is too much. And they don't have that many fruits/veggies at home so I need to prepare myself a large stash.

Yes, drinking water helps everytime, not only for filling you up when no food is available, but also for better digestion and eliminating the toxins. My favorite is sparkling water, it's the only one I like, those bubbles make me feel even more satiated but without giving me bloating or gas. Still water just doesn't taste like water to me nor does it satisfy my thirst.

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Raw vegan for life. Vegan for the animals. Raw for my health.

Raw4ever Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I have a bit of a problem - I am to attend two
> wedding receptions this summer and I'm not sure
> what to do. I have been exclusively raw for more
> than two years. In my heart of hearts, I would be
> contented to stay away but that wouldn't work well
> for my wife (she isn't raw).
>
> Some people have suggested to me that I just eat
> the cooked food and get back to raw on the next
> meal but I'm not prepared to do that. I see cooked
> food as an addictive agent and I'm not willing to
> risk it. In fact, I've made that mistake in the
> past and lost my resolve, returned to a cooked
> regime and struggled to get back to a 100% raw
> diet.
>
>
> Have you ever had this problem? I'm looking for a
> creative solution.

Why can't you just eat beforehand and nosh on raw fruits and veggies, which I am sure will be available beforehand? You could even call the host if she's close to you and ask about the menu. But you don't have to eat anything at all if you don't want. The first course has to be salad and you could bring your own dressing. I don't see what the big deal is.

I think I haven't explained this very well. Here's what the big deal is!

This is a formal dinner event complete with eight courses, each being served to the guests at their assigned tables. It's not a pick and choose situation. Therein lies the problem. It's not just about walking around at a Meet and Greet. Those are easy even if there isn't raw food. I just don't eat, no big deal.

For sure, there will likely be hors d'oeuvres before dinner. That's no problem. It's sitting through the multiple courses, none of which will be appropriate for me that is throwing me a curve.

Ela2013 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Well, that's the problem at social events: they
> focus too much on non-vegan and non-raw foods that
> the raw vegan options are so little. Ever since I
> went raw vegan, I have always struggled with
> eating enough when going to restaurants or to
> social events. At social events I can't eat all
> the fruit in the house or I will be rude. At
> restaurants, the salads are so small that I would
> have to get more than 5 salads to make up for a
> decent raw vegan salad. And the choice for salad
> ingredients is so limited, while their freshness
> is questionable. Besides, the waiter doesn't
> always understand that I want a salad with no
> salt/no oil/no spices/no dressing so I have to
> tell him several times. Or the waiter refuses to
> bring me what I want, like it happened to me once
> when I wanted a certain amount of olives (I was
> eating olives back then) and he said "no, too many
> olives". Or when I wanted 2 apparently different
> salads and the waiter said they were actually
> basically the same so no need to order both. When
> I'm visiting my family, I have to buy food for
> myself because they don't understand how large my
> food portions must be, they still think that
> eating 3 bananas in one sitting is too much. And
> they don't have that many fruits/veggies at home
> so I need to prepare myself a large stash.
>



Good conversation everyone. Yes, when you go raw you quickly realise it is a meat eating/SAD world where healthy options are rarely served. It is easy to brush it off and not think to much about it, but when you do realise how poor the SAD food choices are you come to the conclusion that it is sad and tragic. It is amazing what we eat and call it normal...eating processed food is pretty crazy behaviour, but it is the trap we have been brought up into and think nothing of it. We think nothing of eating a cooked meal with no salad beforehand. We think nothing of eating 100% cooked diet. We don't eat well, we don't exercise, we aren't very spiritual in most cases...we are just busy and overburdened so we don't do much to help ourselves and become educated. Wow, we could so much much better for ourselves, what are we really doing?

raw4ever

just tell the server who is putting the dishes at the table
to bring just a salad for you
tell them that you have dietary restrictions
case closed

if you have to repeat yourself during the choregraphed sequence of them bringing appetizer, salad, main dinner, dessert, coffee, tea , wine etc.

just repeat yourself
no probby bobbie

easy peasy

you won't look like a fool just sitting there if you are a good listener, an excellent conversationalist and are at ease with yourself then people will automatically be at ease with you

Ela2013, I can completely relate to your comments about restaurants and how little they actually provide. It is such a total waste of money.

On my birthday, my wife wanted to take me out for dinner. Beforehand, she went to a restaurant and told them exactly what she wanted explaining that no one ever provides adequate servings and if they can't do it, let her know now. Bless their hearts, they accepted the challenge and actually did it!

By the way, I too drink lots of bubbly water. I prefer it.

TSM, Your comments are spot on. I sometimes wonder how we ever got to eating cooked food in the first place. As I said before, I think this is the next wave. As a society, we are pressing the limits of sustainability. Ultimately, it is a matter of survival of the fittest. True fitness has become increasingly rare.

Thanks La V. I think I'll ask for eight DIFFERENT salads. Maybe it will look so good that everyone else will want some too.

LOL--8 courses of salads! If you can stomach it, go for it. But seriously, you could explain to the hosts (if you're close to them) your restrictions so that they don't have to waste extra meat, etc. in preparing a dish for you.

I have been to plenty of weddings as a vedge and simply told the waiters that I didn't want the next course or when they brought it to the table, had them bring it back.

What I meant about hors d'oeurves time (usually when they have an open bar) is to load up a plate of fruits and veggies and use that as your nibble food during the reception if there are not courses with raw foods.