I need inspiration, motivation, passion, desire, want . . . .

My life has changed a lot for the first time in many, many years. My last child has left the nest, my 8 eight year ‘dating’ relationship ended and my first cat of 20 years passed away (I do have other wonderful cats at home). All of this has taken place in the last 9 months or so.

I am 42 years old and female.

I’ve spent the last 25 years caring for children and now that role, as I knew it, is over. They have grown to be fine, responsible, caring adults –for this I am truly grateful.

Now is the time for me – to do what I want, to find out what makes me tick, lights a fire under me. I am finding that I am lost. Not sure what to do with my life. I do have a job that I mostly like, so at least this is not an issue for the moment.

I know that goal setting is important – I am just not sure how to start. I find just asking myself the question “what do I want?” leaves me speechless.

I am not depressed and I am not joyful. I am existing – going through the motions. I have lost my oomph.

Any advice or comments are welcome. Any titles of any books that anyone has read that they found to be inspiring and motivating would be most appreciated.

HI.
Those are major life changes.
Maybe you just need a time of rest and reflection for now,before the inspirations,hopes,and desires come back for some new direction?
I would say that since you are here,on a raw food forum,that you are in touch with a great foundation of health that will lead you to many new things.
Even if its just peace of mind.

Brian

Kland

I know that feeling oh so well . I know that many people pass through this state and find direction in a new activity, but for me it marked a stage of inner calling to know thyself. I have always noticed it strongest when I have had no demands upon me, and no calls of duty. This is a scenario I have found myself in frequently, and for long periods in my life.

My experience is that it has been an indicative state of internal searching, when I am looking for that which gives meaning and satisfaction to my external activities. The answer that I have found is spiritual at its core. This being a recognition that it all comes from inside me, and that the only thing that matters, is the CHOICE I MAKE ABOUT THINGS.

This may not seem very helpfull in aquiring a new direction, but I have found that it means everything to me. When one chooses to be happy and to see goodness within things, these virtues are experienced and the appropriate activities are automatically engaged.

I think that Byron Katie explains this process very well. If your interested in reading, hearing or viewing this philosophy explained, then go to Byron Katies website and listen to her here [www.thework.com]
Peace

I would take the extra time you have to just relax, be with nature, 'get spiritual'.... and go online 24/7 -- haha, just kidding.

I would enjoy the peace and quiet while it lasts because you never know when you may find more demands on yourself with another relationship or family.

But the best thing that could possibly happen to you (next to becoming enlightened) would be -- to have a passion. When you're 'obsessed' with something, it's almost like being in love. Life is fun and exciting again.

Unfortunately, I think having a passion isn't something that we can make a decision to do -- it sort of happens or unfolds itself gradually and then you're hooked.

Another wonderful thing that could happen to you would be to 'have a best friend' -- which I think is a close second or even better than having a boyfriend.
Again, it's not something that you can make happen consciously.

Another idea -- Volunteering. Like some people mentioned previously on here, it does something to your 'happiness level' to help someone else in need. I read a book about it, but I can't remember the name of it right now.

I can relate to what you're going through only when I imagine that I don't have anymore children to take care of. I have thought I would want to foster babies or children, but then when I think of the reality of getting involved in the Government 'Foster Care' System, and how the kids are drugged and brainwashed, it turns me off.

Lois

Hey Klandestine --

I was exactly where you are five years ago. This is actually a great time in your life!! You are free!!! There is some great advice already posted that I will not repeat, but I say to you just enjoy your discoveries. I was in college when my "last" one left the house. College is a great place to rediscover yourself. I ended up meeting my current partner and had another baby at almost 44, a month after the "last" one made me a grandma. So the circle of life continues...