I'm visiting my daughter in the Boston area and her mother-in-law wants the family to go to a chinese restaurant for mother's day. She's made it clear that that's where we're going even though she knows I'm a raw foodist. Well, there won't be anything for me to eat and I'm trying to decide if I should bring my own food or not eat.

What do you do in these situations?

Any suggestions?

find out the name of the restaurant and phone ahead and tell them what your dietary needs are

ANY good restaurant wants your business and will respect your request

chinese restaurants have tons of veggies (maybe not so many fruits but think pineapple, oranges, etc) so theres no reason they cant make you up an uncooked stirfry of raw veggies and bean sprouts etc

my local chinese place makes this for me all the time or a salad if i want
they always have

brocolli
cabbage
snow peas
onions
lettuce
bak choys and other chinese veggies
pineapple
oranges
mushrooms
almonds
carrots
celery
water chesnuts (not sure if raw )
im sure theres more i just drawing a blank now lol

bring your own dressing if anything at all theyres no reason for them not to accomodate you

...Jodi, the banana eating buddhist




Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/09/2007 12:48AM by Jgunn.

Since you're a mother and this is your day as well I would say there is nothing at Chinese restaurants I can eat and we need to make a compromise. Chinese is probably the worst for finding something for me to eat. If not I would suggest we have a nice dinner with just my daughter and her immediate family and i would skip the big family dinner. It isn't a lot to ask that they go to a place where you can eat. I would be sure not to make a big deal about it. I think some people might be looking for drama and try to use you to fuel it.

I just read Jodi's post and it is good advice. I never thought of asking the restaurant to accomodate your needs.

ooo..

bamboo shoots
beansprouts
red, yellow, green peppers
mangos
garlic
cherries

lol got me on a role lol

...Jodi, the banana eating buddhist




Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/09/2007 12:57AM by Jgunn.

hehe ive been doing that a ocuple of years now after suffering on the sidelines, thinking i cant go anywhere anymore

.. honestly most places will be happy to put something together (any good chef will take it as a challenge hehe)

and they charge you full price without having to waste energy, time or fuel cooking it

...Jodi, the banana eating buddhist

I'd just go and not really eat, or see if they had some kind of salad (hard at a chinese place I know) or fruit bowl (check their dessert menu) I could pick at quietly.

Sarah
[goingbananasblog.com]

radishes
ginger
peanuts
green onions ...

wheeeeeee!

take charge of your food ... dont sit on the sidelines quietly .. since when does eating different mean we have to suffer ?!

...Jodi, the banana eating buddhist

hehe sparkler just to clarify .. i was posting the same time as you i wasnt aiming that sideline comment at you

...Jodi, the banana eating buddhist

No problem, Jodi! It wouldn't have bothered me anyway. For me personally, I'm kinda lazy I guess, 'cos it just seems easier to just go there and either pick at food and not really eat or just order whatever is available at the time - because it seems like so much trouble to ask for a special order - although I've done this before and it works just great too.

Sarah
[goingbananasblog.com]

Mona,

What I do in these situations is bring a bag of fruit we me, like a bag of navel oranges. This usually isn't a problem for a restaurant, as the rest of your party will be ordering food, and having one person who brings their own stuff because they have a unique diet isn't that out of the ordinary.

eat food before u go there
then when u get there just enjoy the company

I think people find anything abnormal too confusing. She probably finds it impossible to imagine what you eat and marginalizes the issue.

A Chinese restaurant might contaminate raw vegs with msg or raw meat - I would avoid eating raw there.

Eat beforehand and bring something to nibble on and look around at all the unhealthy diners around you and feel fortunate -without the fortune cookie.

Mona Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I'm visiting my daughter in the Boston area and
> her mother-in-law wants the family to go to a
> chinese restaurant for mother's day. She's made it
> clear that that's where we're going even though
> she knows I'm a raw foodist. Well, there won't be
> anything for me to eat and I'm trying to decide if
> I should bring my own food or not eat.
>
> What do you do in these situations?
>
> Any suggestions?

This is sad for a few reasons. How come you were not included in making the Mothers Day plans? The mother-in-law chooses the restaurant without asking you what kind of restaurants you like. Is she the queen & you the peasant girl? It's your Mothers day, too, not hers only. Also, your daughter should ask you what you'd like to do for Mothers Day, even if it means you & her spending a few hours together alone, doing something else without the rest of the family.
It sounds like Mothers Day is giving you anxiety, and that is sad, because it should be a happy day.

I stopped doing things that give me anxiety. I stopped doing things that make me unhappy, as long as I have the power too. I also stopped allowing people to make me sad or put me in situations I don't like.

So be happy on Mothers Day! Don't allow anyone to control YOUR Day. Find out what time they are going out to eat. There are 3 (traditional) meals in a day. Breakfast, lunch & dinner. Have breakfast with your daughter, just the two of you. Do your homework alone. Find a place in boston that would have a wonderful place you would enjoy eating breakfast, and take your daughter there. Begin your day doing something that makes you happy, being with your daughter & eating what you enjoy.

If you are planning on not going to the chinese restaurant, don't tell your daughter until it's time to go. You don't want to ruin your breakfast plans and upset her. Later, just say you really wanted to take a walk or go shopping, whatever, and you will catch up with them later. Do your own thing while they are out. Be cheerful and let them think about what they've done, not include you in making your own Mothers Day plans.

If you choose to go, atleast you had a nice breakfast with your daughter, and have some herbal tea or one thing on the menu if you can find one that you can live with.


Be happy, no drama, just smile and enjoy your day.

I truly wish you a happy Mothers Day.


I stopped spending major holidays with my entire family, except for a quiet little holiday with my two children, 19 & 20 and a few close friends. They can drive to see the rest of the family if they choose too, before or after we spend time together. This works out well & I finally actually enjoy and have peaceful, happy holidays now. My entire life up until the last few years, I hated every holiday with my family. One year, my mom & step dad bought me ugly, cheep flanel underware and pajamas, and then they bought my step dads daughter a very expensive leather jacket and some very expensive jewlry. My mom is rude on holidays and never really spoke to me much, my brothers are disfunctional druggies, my uncles are weird, my grandma is grouchy, my cousins fat wife is jealuous of me, my families friends are wierd... the list goes on. I NEVER one time in my entire life had a happy holiday, until a few years ago, I STOPPED spending the holidays with them, and only spending it with my two lovely children. For the first time in my entire life, I smile on holidays and now they are sentimental and special with my son & daughter and a few close freinds.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/09/2007 03:59PM by Rawrrr!.

Thanks for the great suggestions, everyone.

The mother-in-law is looking into seeing if they can prepare raw food for me, but I'm now willing to not eat and just talk to everyone.

Also, my daughter and I decided we're going to enjoy making a raw dinner together. I'm more into eating in than eating out anyway.

I decided the time I can spend with her is more precious than the food. I don't want to be stressed for mother's day. It should be day for rejoicing as mentioned above.

Thanks, again, everyone. You're all terrific.

Mona

i personally would not go.


I think its mean to force you to go there when they know there is nothing there but chopped tomaotes for you to eat.

Stand up for yourself, take your mom somewhere alone later, dont be a doormat

so Mona how did your day go? =)

...Jodi, the banana eating buddhist