Tonight I was at an open air concert with the best blue grass group in the country playing and these people show up with buckets of light sticks to hawk off to the children. Now there were kids running everywhere with blinking light sticks. An organic event turned into synthetic zoo.

Then 3 women sat right behind me with no space to spare and were constantly talking.

I just got up and left but wish I had moved right behind those women in the same manner and started making a bunch of noise ready to ask what's your problem if they had complained.

Oh well back at my cabin in perfect peace.

Sounds to me you were in a negative mood, and your negative experience was partly due to it. If you knew that kids were allowed to the event, you couldn't have really expected anything different. With light sticks or without the kids are very unlikely to sit still and behave in the "organic" manner. You also knew that general public was allowed to the event, and is it really that unexpected to find somebody talking behind your back while you are trying to listen? Small deal if you are happy, you just turn around smile to them and tell them you are trying to listen, worst case scenario you just move to another place and continue to enjoy the music. That you wished to have moved right behind them to annoy them as well sounds to me you were just grumpy

>Banana ice-cream rocks!<



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/04/2012 09:30AM by chat.

I have no doubt whatsoever that most people don’t know How to Act because they don’t know How to Eat. Do you remember the Summer Fest in North Carolina back in 2000? I remember someone who went to the event commented that there were around 50 kids or so and that they were so well behaved (because of their diet) that it really made you pause and reflect. Another example that comes to mind is a Video of Jericho Sunfire’s 2 kids and how well behaved they were. Of course, we can extrapolate that ill-behaved children usually grow up to be ill-behaved adults.

At any rate, Noise Pollution of all sorts whether it’s car alarms or those obnoxious car stereos with the heavy base or rude people talking at a music event or during a movie sure can be a major Pain in the Ass.

Peace and Love..........John

PS Your cabin sounds quite blissful.

Summer Fest 2000, yes I was there. Raw food kids have the biggest and most beautiful eyes and are well behaved as you said.They would never run around hitting each with light sticks. And the parents would be enlightened enough, pun intended to not give them such a synthetic item.

I think now I should have turned my chair around and led a discussion on rudeness, respect, courtesy, common decency, ediquit, manners, personal space, etc, with those 3 untill they were "inspired" to leave.

Ya my cabin is bliss.

B2E



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/04/2012 01:17PM by back2eden.

back2eden,

Sorry you had a bad time, but why not have politely asked the women behind you if they might allow you to listen to the performers? Most people don't get defensive about that kind of thing. No, not even SAD eaters

It's true that your cabin offers only company and stimuli you approve, and one may as well just stay at home if, that's what one is after. If you want to be out and listening to blugrass bands, etc. in the fresh air, you have to commune with all sorts. It's a trade-off, unfortunately. Maybe the next one will be a better experience for you, and I hope you do give it a try!

It's difficult to turn a negative into a positive experience. I'm sorry you didn't enjoy the environment at the event.

A group of random people can certainly create unexpected results. The trick to attending or participating in events that bring together large groups of diverse people is to not have expectations.

You went to the event and found it not to your liking and so try to let those negative feelings drift away. There is some practice involved and can take lots of different experiences to try it out on but it's nice to have a clear mind and lightness of being without the lasting effects of negativity.


Love,
Prism

Prism, I was going to say the same thing about Expectations and it reminds me about 2 Books (Way of the Peaceful Warrior and The Celestine Prophecy) that I was anxious to see make Movies and I remember when they came out, my Expectations were so high that I was really disappointed with the Movies. But then, when I went back to watch them both several years later with Low Expectations, I was amazed at how good the Movies really were.

So there’s a lot to be said for having Low Expectations about those things we have such little control over, like “large groups of diverse people” - great point Prism - this is definitely worth remembering and applying.

Peace and Love..........John

Yup,I can imagine.
This is one of the reasons I have never been to a rock concert...you enjoy the music better just poppin in a cd in your stereo at home.
And at home you can SIT DOWN!!!!

I think that giving a discussion on rude behavior, etc. at public events would have been quite appropriate. I agree with Tamukha also. You could have politely asked them to tone it down because being able to hear the band was the main reason everyone came to the event. I, myself would have asked politely. Peace!

I am very comfortable asking people (nicely) to turn down their headphones (just did it a while ago, LOL) and other noise-making situations. But I do feel you. It seems to have gotten worse, for some reason. More self-centeredness in the world? People allow their children to run amok in restaurants, libraries...I think there is some lack of being able to go outside themselves and think if they are bothering others. It's all about THEM. And what sucks is that you are trying to enjoy yourself and do something special but have to deal with humanity. Ugh--LOL.

I like activities that are not very "touristy" and therefore seem to attract likeminded people.

I just ran across this article mentioning Psychopaths - that makes me think of John Rose

[endoftheamericandream.com]

Maybe another 'piece of the puzzle' about psychopaths and behavioral problems is something that I recently read in an old National Geographic magazine I found about Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, and it had photos of babies and children with FAS. So I was interested and started looking it up online and saw more photos and then also read about FAE - Fetal Alcohol Effects - that could be children of mothers who only drink say two drinks a week while they're pregnant.

But the point I'm trying to make is the psychopaths could be FAS babies and after seeing a photo of a criminal with FAS, I think a lot of criminals have this same look. FAS=psychopaths=criminals.

Sorry to be so negative, and I guess I'm taking this subject to a different level, but it makes me depressed about the babies born that way.

Listen, I've been at lots of events with children, veggie, vegan, raw, cooked, non-TV watching, media junkies, and I can tell you that kids are kids. They are all lunatics. There is no single thing that makes kids behave one way or the other.

What some people consider not being "well behaved" is often the natural boundary pushing progression of a young human being. Bringing ourselves back to that level from our own childhood experiences can be very helpful in connecting with young energy instead of simply resenting it and resenting them. They belong as much as we do, light sticks or no.

Coco, this is the issue I take with that: when I see young children these days, many times it does NOT remind me of when I was a kid. My brother and I would do physical things like playing with a frisbee or ball, but we also read a lot and played chess and other board games. I feel that many kids these days are either hyper or somehow riled up/ramped up/autism spectrum (constant shrieking and screaming) that is not within the norm or how I remember our playing as kids. I don't hear it as joyful but just revved up. And I do believe that diet and general atmosphere of lack of parental attention and negative, worldly influences (media, horrible "games" contribute greatly to this.

Weird inclusion of the winky smiley yet again...In any case, I meant to add that I don't think we were that loud and obnoxious and I don't think kids have to be to be playing.

Those emoticons show up in the oddest places sometimes, don't they?


I have some examples from my life of kids from radically different upbringing, they are anecdotal but still real life examples of kids acting like kids.

3 raw vegan, unschooled, co-sleeping, unregulated tv and video games, completely alternative life styled kids, total wild things. I mean, no boundaries.

3 vegetarian, unschooled, co-sleeping, no tv, completely alternative life styled kids who live in the country with animals, also no boundaries, these kids have no idea how to "behave".

3 kids, traditional upbringing, sad diet, tons of media of all sorts, town living, best behaved boys ever. Completely polite, attentive, sensitive to others.

2 kids, town living, co-sleeping, alternative life style, very well traveled, very active physically, a very careful diet with the inclusion of moderate meat/dairy/eggs, total wild things, no boundaries, dangerous behavior, temper tantrums, CRAZY PANTS!

And my kids who are *mostly* well behaved but have spent a Great deal of time travelling and in public places with myself and family members. And they have their moments, believe me. The 11 year old particularly, he behaves for ME but anybody else and he forgets how to listen entirely.

What this tells me is that it's more about natural temperament and parenting than anything but kids will still just be kids. And I do remember my siblings and I and our friends being LOUD but it doesn't sound as loud when it's outside at the beach or the park.

Kids are just kids. Hooligans, the lot of them.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/06/2012 06:27PM by coco.

I don't know what I meant when I said that last thing about "kids playing." I think I was trying to say that kids playing doesn't need to equal total pandemonium.

Coco, I am sorry that I forgot to state the obvious--parental support. Boundaries. One huge thing I see nowadays is the parent (usually the mom because women tend to be people-pleasers) ASKING the child if s/he wants to leave yet, what they want to eat (asking very young children with an array of possibilities--overwhelming). In other words, totally abdicating their responsibility as parents. Yes, I am an expert and has never raised children. One of THOSE But at some point, it's common sense. Young children crave boundaries; older ones need a bit of freedom. Gradual freedom, of course.

There is nothing dictatorial about telling your child that you are leaving in five minutes. Give them a chance to transition but for God's sake, asking a five-year-old if she wants to leave a cafe is absurd! All the parent does is leave the impression that the child is calling the shots.

banana who Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> (media, horrible "games" ) contribute greatly to this.


If you type " and then ) , you get that smiley face.

"

I whole-heartedly agree. Children crave boundaries, it helps them know what to expect of their world and how they are to interact in it. Lots of parents are fluffy goofballs about that responsibility for sure. Makes me cringe to see overly permissive moms and dads out in public with their off spring. I feel for those kids.

Coco, I can always tell the parents who wised up (formerly too permissive) because their kids are flipping out at any parental command. The parents seem panic-striken because they are so afraid of their kids hating them. LOL. Are you in USA just for vacation or have you moved permanently?

Kid, the last time I did it was on purpose. Something with the ) sets it off

banana who Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Coco, I can always tell the parents who wised up
> (formerly too permissive) because their kids are
> flipping out at any parental command. The parents
> seem panic-striken because they are so afraid of
> their kids hating them. LOL. Are you in USA just
> for vacation or have you moved permanently?
>
> Kid, the last time I did it was on purpose.
> Something with the ) sets it off


I'm not sure if they are panic-striken because of their kids hating them, or that they are afraid that some PC nutball will report them if they try to get their kids under control.

Years ago I was in a "out of control" kid situation in a store & one of the employees marched right over & stood in front of us, just daring me to strike my kid.

I'm not saying I'm for corporal punishment at all costs, but sometimes a little tap on the butt may be needed to bring a misbehaving child to attention.

When I'm in a store, and I see little kids acting out, I figure they're having a 'reaction' to the smells of the chemicals from the clothes or whatever. If I'm in a restaurant, and I see little kids throwing a tantrum, I figure they're having a 'reaction' to the chemicals in the food. I figured it out through personal experience. But when I'm in the grocery store, and I see a mother with three or four little kids and she's yelling at them and swatting them for no reason, I figure she's a lowlife.

I figure a mom of 4 kids is at the end of her tether. No single person can attend to 4 small demanding presences and still have her wits about her, where is the time for self-healing? Goodness. Not that this is an excuse for using physical dominance over wee people, just that I can see where it's coming from. I would never have more than 2 babies, there is just NO WAY I'd have the energy for more than that, and I'm an energetic person. They are REALLY NEEDY! I mean, I haven't gone to the bathroom on my own or slept by myself or finished a meal uninterrupted in over 11 years, lol.

BW We're visiting my parents .

Kidraw, I think changes in scenery, energy levels, and all the things you mentioned can make kids excitable. Mine get very different when we go someplace new. It can be hard for me to deal with and to know how to handle them when they start to go a little bonkers. It doesn't help that my family love to load them up with plastic toys and junky food. I really work hard to minimize those things but some people are just oblivious about why you would even care about that stuff and then there's my mother who thinks that it's her grandmother's prerogative to spoil them . Ack, mom, no.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/07/2012 01:25PM by coco.

Now I am leery of all emoticons and will just type what I mean, like I used to do: narrows eyes suspiciously

I see it as the main problem being that psycho-emotionally undisciplined adults produce children they cannot discipline, and who will end up being psycho-emotionally undisciplined adults, continuing the cycle of devolution to lower primatism. It is normal for a child to run amok here and there, as they are testing their boundaries and learning to regulate their own behavior. It is normal for an adult to get frustrated and to be inconsistent with/confused about disciplining here and there, as they figure out what is best for their kids. What is not normal is that these irregularities are becoming normative behaviors. For the purposes of this thread, it is understandable that one or two kids might have acted up at an event unfamiliar to them and with a parent that wasn't modeling proper behavior. But a majority of the children should have known how to behave and should have demonstrated basic courtesy, which is the crux of the matter--courtesy toward others. That it was a widespead problem means something is very wrong with how people in general are socialized.

when i was a kid

i loved glow sticks

thought they were kinda magical

and maybe if you came up to me and tried to take it away from me

i mighta just struck you with it


and now, i would rather see a firefly

La Veronique, I was told that firefly in Portugese is vaga-lume which means wandering light. A beautiful expression, yes?


My favorite raw vegan

trive


<<La Veronique, I was told that firefly in Portugese is vaga-lume which means wandering light. A beautiful expression, yes?>>

yes, extremely beautiful!!

i LOVE that!

w
a
n d
e r i
n g

l
i
g
h
T

Wow, this post really brings up issues for me. I remember going to go see a movie when these 3 really large teenagers sat in front of me. I didn't stop to think that perhaps the movie was aimed primarily for a younger crowd than myself. It was also a kind of movie which would have attracted gang members and a rough crowd.

I am not sure that I would go that movie now, I am in a totally different place now. Still I was just shocked at how much talking they were doing, and I paid it no mind as the trailers were going, I figured they would stop when the movie started. But No they didn't! Further they actually made a cell phone call! So I just tapped the back of one of their seats. (I was wearing heavy boots at the time) At first I thought that was a mistake, as one started to look upset. But when I just continued to watch the movie, he just turned around, watched the movie, turned off his cell and stopped talking!

So I guess I just used a communication style that he understood, without making too much fuss. But I didn't think they would respond to me kindly asking for some quiet. I am not sure why. I should have been more open to that as a possibility.