How do you deal with toxic people in your life? friends who you like but have a bad effect on you? One effect of going raw for me is to prefer solitude more than ever.

If someone is toxic, are they really a friend? I sometimes prefer solitude,but I wish I knew how to network, and sometimes I feel alone.

I don't think that solitude is the answer. Maybe we need to choose our friends more carefully, which everyone should do anyway. Living with nature does not mean living alone.
In my case, I am looking forward to spending some time with nature, even in rudimentary conditions, to do a 'mental cleansing'. I have to get rid of some bad habbits and I hope nature will help me.

Maybe make some new friends? Some that share your current interests.
Then maybe the 'toxic' friends may not hold such appeal anymore.

FFX

Rab, why do you say that solitude is not the answer? I think solitude is very important in really discovering who we are. It doesn't have to be permanent but choosing between toxic people and solitude is an easy one for me.

What do you mean by "toxic," WanderRA? Are you talking about diet or are you talking about people who are rude or dishonest, or mean or manipulative? It's hard to answer without knowing what you mean.

Like Fruit Faery, I would say its time to find new friends. Start going to some raw food potlucks, and make friends there. Or perhaps start going to some yoga classes, and find people who are interested in their healing versus just wanting to party or get high.





Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/29/2012 02:07AM by Prana.

Changing your lifestyle can make you a bit like a snake shedding its skin... or a butterfly shedding its cocoon. Sometimes old things fall away. Sometimes people just go different ways, even if there is no bad blood or toxicity. It's part of growing.

Just be yourself and you will attract what suits you best! =)

Periods of solitude can be absolutely necessary for growth, same like strict mono-eating for weeks can be very cleansing... but in the long term, I think we are meant for blessings and abundance.

thanks for the replies! This person isnt bad at all, but behind their pleasant front I feel an anger and bitterness that kinda just irks me. When he's with me he's recklessly insulted other people we know, and I know he's done the same to me when he's been with them. People like that I would rather avoid. He eats junk and doesn't excersise, his anger comes from all the tension he carries because of this, but he's always critisising other people for his own shortcomings. Classic psychological cathartis, when a person blames the world on their own issues.

How about you only visit with him and others like him when you feel motivated to see them? When you find yourself missing something about his character you may be in a state of mind to appreciate your time together. The rest of the time do things you're genuinely drawn too. I think we can get very caught up in the dogma of our lives, doing what we think we're "supposed" to be doing but when you break free of that, be it with habits like diet or thought patterns, the rest of the behaviors of life that we take forgranted become something we reflect on more and more. It's a funny thing to suddenly find yourself less than comfortable with a habit, you know? Something you've done for ages doesn't feel right one day and there's just no going back to a time when it did. You either have to live uncomfortably or... change something.
Life is a wonderful journey of self-discovery. Have a great time on your adventure .

I knew a couple of people like this. My advice is don't force yourself, if you don't feel like it, don't hang out or talk to that person. Say you're busy or whatever. Eventually, this relationship will dissolve. I had tolerated a negative and critical person like this out of loyalty and sense of obligation for some time, and that really poisoned my life. Their negativity does rub off on you, whether you want it or not. I started noticing that I began being critical of people, e.t.c. - something which was never a part of me. Once she was out of my life, I felt such a relief. Like someone said - people come to you for a season, a reason or a lifetime. We do outgrow some relationships, it's natural and normal, just let go.

Wander,

Why do you feel you must keep this person in your life? What do they give you that you don't get from others who treat you, and people in general, well?