I often get accused of fanaticism. I find that I can't cheat without consequences. It makes me so mad when people pressure me into having something that I know won't make me feel good. I'm not following a raw diet even, but that was much worse. But why do people do that? why can't they just accept that maybe some people can't cheat and still feel healthy?

Mislu, you actually seem really sweet, not at all fanatical. Maybe tell people you have some disease, that's why you can't eat this or that.... allergies, celiac disease, gastrointestinal reflux, fatty liver, etc... that way THEY get to feel superior, and you get to be left alone.

they dont need to accept it smile and carry on .. you cant change them dont worry about them

i always lie ..like above lol ..keeps people off my back nowadays everyone tht knows me knows how i eat and its a nonissue now

...Jodi, the banana eating buddhist

A woman named Jinje responds this way in social settings, "I'm only eating my favorite foods."

I like this response because it sounds like she's pampering herself instead of being fanatical. Who can respond negatively to someone who's eating nothing but their favorite foods?

smilebig has a good one-

i always enjoy my food, and feel good afterward, and generally don't want what other people have. at all.

it's kinda snotty, but i'm generally can say i eat all my favorite foods,whenever i want, as much as i want, and always feel satisfied.

i don't miss crummy foods, and i let that be known.

peace-

It is kind of sad when my Hungarian "friends" call me fanatic sitting at their table facing rich Hungarian style feast ( deli meat, lard with white bread or oily, cooked chicken `paprikas`) meanwhile they take their medications and speak about that the doctor just had prescribed for them oxygen, so they have to wear that nose thing for a couple hours a day.
It will be long time until most people realise the diet-health connection.

it's a good point, and very familiar to all of us. I'm afraid the judgements from the 'outside' world will never end.
I'm not a 100% raw foodist (yet), but I have been a vegetarian for 23 years now (I'm 29). also, I stopped drinking alcohol when I was 18. I don't know which of the two seems more 'offensive' to people, but both things have been getting on people's nerves for unclear reasons. for the past 20+ years, I have been in positions where I had to 'defend' myself and my way of life towards others....and why? why is it always the people who make clear choices for themselves that end up defending themselves towards others? after all these years I grew so tired of it, that I prefer not to discuss it at all. I have yet to meet the first carnivore that feels the need to defend it's food habit, and all the consequences of it, towards me!
sometimes people are genuinely interested, in a positive way. I have no problem explaining myself to those people. but others, the majority unfortunately, who consider me a freak of nature, or something similar; with them I just avoid the discussion, 'cause I'm tired of it. often, when people ask my why I don't eat meat, I just say that the idea of eating a living creature that was born and raised under horrible circumstances, and then killed just for my consumption is simply too disgusting. that usually shuts people up for a while. it's sad that I have to be so graphic.
the 'I only eat my favourite foods' is a good one, I'll have to remember it!

how could you cheat without consequences? ha!

I don't see how anyone else can make you veer from the path that YOU want, seems pretty impossible to me. Maybe you want their acceptance more at this momement, nothing wrong with that, but perhaps thats the part to focus on and not your 'fanaticism' which, once again is a label that only has meaning in comparasion to what 'everyone else' is doing.

I agree with Jgunn...LIE. next time just say: you left your oxygen tank at home, but really you use on all the time...promise"

I never discuss my diet with anyone unless I think they are genuinely curious about health..usually i'm agreeing on how good lasagna is or getting piss drunk or whatever, and the only label I use for myself is 'vegetarian'.

If you are really struggling in social situations..what choice to you have but to create one's that are more comfortable, or be very comfortable doing what you truly want?

Lejla Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> It is kind of sad when my Hungarian "friends" call
> me fanatic sitting at their table facing rich
> Hungarian style feast ( deli meat, lard with white
> bread or oily, cooked chicken `paprikas`)
> meanwhile they take their medications and speak
> about that the doctor just had prescribed for them
> oxygen, so they have to wear that nose thing for a
> couple hours a day.
> It will be long time until most people realise
> the diet-health connection.


haha, that is true... I'm Hungarian and was over there one summer in high school being anorexic & vegetarian... oh man, it was impossible. My food had to be low-fat AND vegetarian... my relatives thought I was nuts. My grandmother understood my diet to mean fried chicken tee hee.

On the other hand, my mom, who grew up there, went to a natural healer woman there who put her on a raw food detox diet and advised her not to eat cooked food or meat. So I grew up with a Hungarian mother who was very anti-cooked food, anti-doctors, and we always had tons of fruits & vegetables in the house. When we were sick we never had to go to the doctor or take medications unless we seemed REALLY REALLY sick - like one time my eye wouldn't stop hurting so then I had to go, and it turned out that I had a splinter in my eye. But for routine colds and flus, no way. Just bed rest & lemon juice.

Dear Sunshine79,
You are one lucky Hungarian. My Mum did not know about healthy diet, so I was raised on tasty but harmful food in Europe and now I try to escape from the consequences or reverse them. Maybe it`s not too late )

I think the reason we have trouble with this is because connection is so important to human existence. It's hard to find the balance of nurturing your body and dietary needs and nurturing your community, fellowships and human connections.

I have often felt that "you think you're superior" energy from people when they question my food habits or when I deny or refuse something they're offering.
I really do think that a lot of people are curious though and they want to know how you we do it.

Keep in mind that the majority of people think you HAVE to have meat and dairy and bread to be healthy so they have a lot of fear inside them and that's what comes out a lot. It's really more about them.

Just keep on keeping on and let your radiance shine and eventually people will come around and want what you have. It's best to lead by example.

Namaste

Lejla,
I have similar experiences with people. In conversations I mention that I can't eat fried food anymore, and I quite often hear 'theres a pill for that'. They say it like I actually miss fried food and am deprived of it. I would say thats a large degree of projection on their part. I explain that I didn't get better after using the medications, antacids etc...it actually made my condition worse. The only thing that helped was for me to change my general eating habits.

But I explain further, and usually they gasp...no caned or frozen juices, canned pineapple, generally no dairy products, very limited animal foods, very limited processed foods. Actually today i felt a bit sick after having stuffed dolmas made with processed rice polish. i usually don't have much problem with that, but I did today. They think these foods are 'fun' but its different for someone who has developed a sensitivity to this stuff.

Its kind of annoying, the topic came up at work today, and someone said "you can have things in moderation". (hes on some diet for weight loss) I just said I can't ever have fried food, he just said 'after awhile you loose the ability to digest it'. I just let the conversation die after that, as I know he has a different perspective. hes concerned about weight, and not suprisingly he also has high cholestrol.

I must admit that perhaps I'm not helping. I cheat, and I sometimes actually like the taste of some things I know aren't good. It tastes good, and seems ok, until about 10-15 minutes after eating certain items. Some are not too bad, but some make me feel like I am dying. About 6 months ago I had a doughnut that was fried in cold oil, so it was especially laden with trans fats...that made me feel very, very altered, like I was given a very powerful sedative. Its toxic thats for sure.

I think it's never too late... my mom was in her early 30's, up till then she ate breads & meats like everyone else... she's nearly 70 now and has almost never gone to the doctor... except when having kids and once she had an elbow injury. Also, she's never been even close to 100% raw, she doesn't like losing weight... she just eats tons of fruit and generally natural food, more or less... some crappy stuff too but apparently it's been a decent enough diet to have gotten rid of her prior ailments and to have kept new ailments from cropping up.

Good luck to you!

Sunshine79,

Thank you for the support! It feels good to hear things from another perspective. I have been 'fantatical' most of my life. Healthy eating (to the best of my knowledge at the time) since I was in my teen years. I made some bad choices based upon incomplete knowledge, but I think over all the effects must have had some benefit. People generally think I'm 20 years younger than I am. I often am suprised when I hear that, but then when I think about it, I think its true. I meet people who are my age, and I just think to myself 'you got to be kidding'. I don't think of them as looking their age, I think of them as looking much older, but to most people thats what they are anticipating.

I looked at a NH site to read more, and perhaps I shouldn't be concern with what is normal, but what is right and best. I keep forgetting that I am around people that are 1/2 my age all the time, and I don't feel any different in appearance. But socially I am very different, and they are always suprised that I am older then they expected.

I haven't done a fast in a while, but in my teen years I did several fasts, but in retrospect I wish I had sought more guidance. I also did a sprout mono diet for some time. That was more by instinct. For some reason it was the only thing that appealed to me.

Thank you!

Yeah, it is crazy to fit in sometimes. Just a story: couple years ago when I was not even raw eater, I just din not eat total junk, but I ate organic eggs, dairy etc., and I just suggested to an old (about80 years old) friend , that it would be so good if he did not smoke,, at least when I`m visiting. He looked at me (actually that was not easy, I hardly could see him through the smoke, just the other side of the table) And with real concern in his eyes he shook his head and said "You going to kill yourself with your habits". Ha-ha. I could`t say anything else. Sometimes you just can`t do anything about them.
Anyways, it is good to be in touch with similar minded guys with their "habits", supporting each other.

Lejla,
I agree, its good to be on the board. I don't think we agree on everything, or have the same habits,but I believe everyone is going the right direction. That really means something.

I never understand people who defend smoking. Years ago they said its not really proven, or a little won't hurt you. Now everyone knows, but now they are specifically doing it BECAUSE its 'bad' and annoying to others. They have a 'right' to smoke and nobody can stop them, and they are constantly annoyed that their rights are being taken away. Its getting quiter, but I can tell its been a rough ride for smokers to adjust to smoking in certain areas. I don't have much compassion for them smoking, other than I hope they quit for my health and for theirs.

Years ago a relative came to stay. When I came home from school I came home to a horrible smoke filled house, it was like the place was on fire. It all started because my uncle asked "mind if I smoke". My mother thought it would only be a single smoke or two, and it would be easy to air out. But she didn't know that hes a chain smoker. From the moment he wakes up to the moment he goes to sleep he is smoking. Its awful. I came home and said its so smokey and it stinks. As a little kid I didn't hold anything back. It didn't exactly go over really well, but it at least started an honest dialog between him and the rest of the family.

i don't know about telling lies. i mean, in my experience lies weight heavy on the soul and i think they make it hard to trust the honesty of other people when you aren't honest yourself.
just my take on that.

i love the 'fave foods' thing, i think that's great. lots of people are totally picky eaters so it isn't hard for them to understand someone else not liking something. i have often said, "no thanks, i'm not fond of that food." or " that looks good but i think i'll have ___ right now." even telling someone you're not in the mood for something at the moment is fine.
i remember someone here years ago talking about having to explain his diet to his young students. one of them thoughtfully brought him some pineapple (canned) one day, he graciously thanked her, i think he even had a small bite, and disposed of it later. i found that to be a lovely story with a wonderful message.

i remember being new to raw and wanting to shout from the rooftops about the miracle i had discovered. i wanted everyone else to share my joy and increasing good health, i wanted to give that gift to everyone. that hardly goes over well EVER.
these days i don't even really talk about health or diet unless someone asks me outright, then i am more than happy to discuss it. they are generally very pleased to hear what i have to say and it is so gratifying to feel like i have passed along something valuable to someone who wanted it.

when i was new to raw i also had a trick for dealing with "cheats". if i wanted something that was 'off the list' i let myself take a bite and chew it up but then i spit it out and rinsed my mouth. it was only the taste i was after after all. i did this a few times with chocolate but it left such a horrible after taste in my mouth that i soon came to associate it with that and didn't want it anymore.

Coco,
Thank you for your input. I think the part about honesty is so true. I think bryans post on "cures any an all disease" is a great one. Responsibility for ones health is what it is. I don't have anyone to blame for what I do. While its true someone can pressure, tease, dislike, envy or appreciate the choices I make, they are still choices I make. On the other end, its nice to appreciate that its all too common for people not to want to take responsibility. Its done daily on a large scale.

I understand that whole think about eating a natural diet maybe not appreciated by most people. Few people want to take responsibility for making changes. Most people resent suggestions that they need improving, even if its an invitation to feel better.

Someone at work is so enthusiastic about his new diet. Everyone in my work area is so interactive with him on that. I am very supportive, but someone else takes pleasure in joking with him, or getting 'in his face' literally with some forbidden item, and then eating it. They both laugh, and the one on the diet is so incredible at turning the occation to a joke about him, which I totally love. Still, I think on some level he thinks of these changes as being largely temporary until he looses weight. I am very, very cautious at suggesting permanent changes, or any ultimate no no's. I made the mistake at saying that I can't eat fried foods ever, which I think he saw as some type of suggestion for him. he just replied, you can eat those on occation. And naturally you will loose the ability to digest fried food if you never eat them. Sigh...I guess sort of, but I haven't found that I can get used to that stuff by constant exposure.

I agree about feeling uncomfortable lying, although IMO it's a personal thing. To me, lying has always seemed like I feel ashamed of my real reasons, as if they aren't good enough. I just try to communicate in a very gentle, loving way that it's nobody's business but mine what I put in my mouth. It's amazing how quickly the blushes come out and the topic changes when you say that with a grin and a wink.

If i say I don't want it, that should be good enough.

well goody for you

hmmmmm..... i just thought of something

if people keep continuing the onslaught of questions...just reply

'GOOGLE IT!!!!!

Coconut cream,
I went to your webpage, some very interesting things posted there. You are amazing, I wish more women were fruit lovers. Do you dine exclusively on fruit? Your skin is the most amazing. I think you are wearing a little make up in some photos, but I am sure you would look great with none at all. Women shell out billions in lotions, skin care products, make up etc...trying to look like that. Why do so few women seem to know what you know?