Awwwwwright! I guess we're going to camp! Sundancer, I hope to do some of all that this month! Today, I'm hoping to corral my mind, which is like a herd of wild horses, and sit to meditate for 15 minutes! Start a list of things I want to address, some things I HAVE to address, like financial budgeting, to keep finances from becoming a stress point.

Beginning morning with psyllium/bentonite cleanse and soon will make a green smoothie with banana, mango, and romaine. Colonic at 1:00/beforehand will stop at Ralph's to pick up few things (for juicing). Home again, I'll have good free time to organize some camp itinerary!

Later, girlscouts!

Hey girls--
I just posted on the other thread; the one thing I didn't do that I really wanted to was what you did -- meditate! And organizing camp itinerary. "Camp itinerary" -- I like that! My mind is also just like a herd of wild horses! So I'm looking forward to doing that this weekend, which I actually have off (unheard of in the restaurant biz!!!) So happy camping to us!!!
Sundancer

DAY 2...

***ROTFLOL***

I love you two! You have such great spirits and I'm so happy that you've joined me on this camping adventure - I was secretly hoping that you would!!! Wonder if anyone else will throw in their lot with us???

Puh-LEASE...my mind most times is like a herd of wild mustangs that got a little too happy on the "weed" - that's my MAIN problem!!! That's especially why I need meditation / exercise so much; if I can't focus,be still, and control my mind instead of it controlling me, how the heck can I deal effectively with stressful situations, or think clearly?

Here's my little report for last night/ today so far:

Last night...

Instead of watching TV, I started re-reading a wonderful book I'd bought years ago on Kundalini Yoga; it's not just about the exercises (asanas), but,like Raw, it's (also) a way of life. Wrote 12 things in my journal that I am grateful for,then I ate a very early dinner. At around 7pm-ish grabbed one of the dogs I take care of and went for a very invigorating walk - something I'll do again tonight. Actually, day before I took 2 dogs out walking - separately - talk about being tired when I got done! And these were no strolls, people...we MOVE!

Before bed I did my 20 min. night-time meditation ( I'm working with a Chakra clearing meditation - one specifically for morning, and another one for night)- and also practised a mudra (yoga hand position) and meditation for a Good Morning for about 3 minutes (will work my way up to 11 mins). Whenever I've done that mudra in the past I actually SLEEP most of the night - remember, I'm an insomniac - and I have a VERY good morning...I'm pleased to report that it worked!

Today:

Got up and did my 20 min. clearing meditation, plus an 11 minute mantra called Triple Mantra (for protection from physical and non-physical obtacles and dangers throughout the day). Ran an errand or two, then went to the market...and, do you know, I was GIVEN cabfare to get home?!!! Oh,yes I was! I was able to get lots of oranges, 7 bunches bananas, a couple of pineapples,another big watermelon - this batch I've been getting lately is SO sweet and delicious - frozen berries, sunflower sprouts, avocados and I treated myself to organic peaches and grapes, something I do NOT do often! I can't pick this much stuff up when I do my usual run by bus, so I've been singing all day!!!

I've eaten (?) so far a giant mug of OJ, two giant nana-berry smoothies, I have a bowl of watermelon that I'll probably have after my walk(s) and then those peaches...they're looking and smelling mighty fine to me right now!

A little more reading, meditation, and then sleepytime!

Can't wait to hear how you guys are doing - all the best to you!

Oh, Soraya, I just posted this glum 'ole thing in my journal, and then come over here and hear all this good spirit from you and feel so sheepish. I need a refreshing sleep, that's all. Maybe the colonic did a number on me today and I didn't rest when I should've. Typical. This is something I've been noticing lately...I resist stopping, resting, sleeping. I need to look at this because it is a mental/psychological matter.

You and Sundancer have a lagging camp-mate here. I'll get with the program. Well, I guess I did well enough today. Got some more colon cleansing, and ate well, got some chores and necessities done, helped someone out with something, and did some introspection (but not too focussed).

You both had a great day, and I am happy to hear that. And, sweet dreams to you both, and me too.

Another day off tomorrow which is lovely and I hope to spend the day well...and I also mean WELL!

Hey girls--
My computer is running soooo slow today -- I'm not sure what's up. And the little one is sick :{ But I'm doing great! I worked last night, did a banquet that had lots of yummy veggie things on it that I would have allowed myself to indulge in, had I not gone to camp here, but instead, I ate my avo sprout salad with crudite from the dinner, and today I'm fasting with some of the others and I feel great! Didn't make it to the Y though, but that's ok. I'm going to do a bunch of house cleaning to go with my self cleaning today and take a walk later. Also do some yoga, stream of consciousness writing and start that meditation book to help lasso those wild horses in my head -- yee haw!!!
Elakti, I'm glad you have the day off. Give yourself this day to rest and pamper yourself.
I'll check back in later!
Sundancer

Elakti,

You're NOT a lagging camp-mate by any means! You had a rough day, yes, and you're detoxing like crazy, but you're still doing the best that you can and that's all anyone can ask of you; even you, yourself!

I still have issues as well with stopping to rest / sleep when my body calls for it sometimes, but I'm getting better. A big part of the issue for me was wanting to keep watching the tube as it was zoning and numbing me out...I didn't have to think or face whatever may have been bugging me at the time, so I agree that it's problably a mental thing for you as well...

We're all still learning and growing, dear, so make sure you rest up today - you fortunate one, having the day off - and be gentle to yourself, okay?

Sundancer,

I hope "Little" feels better soon (that's how Coco refers to her own little one)! And you must have felt wonderful last night as you chose your own eating path - good for you!!! I love the plans you have for yourself today - I'll be joining you briefly for some house-cleaning of my own, too... And have I told you how much I love your infectious spirit and humor?!!?

Oh...meant to ask what sprouts you had in your salad...

_____________________

DAY 3

Last night I walked 2 dogs again - my legs are in heaven! - and had a medium-ish bowl of watermelon for dinner; SO good! Of course I had to interupt my sleep to go to the bathroom - THANKS, watermelon! - but I actually slept for about four hours straight last night!!!

Normally, if I get about two hours, I'm absolutely estactic!

I fell asleep right after finishing my meditations, and went immediately into deep sleep; no tossing like I usuall would do, no dreams either. Ahhhhhhh.... I'm beginning to look forward to my meditations, now...

Actually what I resumed doing - did it last summer - was to have a warm bath at night and a cold on in the morning. Yes, you read that right...cold. I massage myself with almond oil first, then massage in and out of the cold water stream. It's a royal shock to your system but MAN do you feel like you've just begun to truly live!!! I can't describe it. It really revs up your circulation, and you shouldn't do it during menstruation, but it's an experience worth having. I don't go ice-cold right away though - still getting used to this again! - so I start out a half-step above, and then go really cold for the last 30 or more seconds...LAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! You really start to sing!!!

I'll check in later myself...had some OJ and a nana-berry-cherry smoothie, but somethings calling me name and I have to go figure out what it is!

Happy day, everyone!

'Till latah!

You ladies are doing great; glad to hear about your days and your self-care. Sounds good: good eating, meditations, writing, singing, and bracing showers.

I am HUNGRY. No fruit. Well, 2 bananas being saved for tomorrow breakfast and a melon which I am hesitating to eat because the others caused a lot of gas. I ate a big salad for breakfast. Have had some prunes. And another smallish salad. Hardly have eaten anything all day. Feel famished quote unquote...this is terribe not having a good supply of ripe fruit. I am craving fruit. Now THAT is good!

I slept late...'til almost 8. Returned to bed after taking Masha for walk and rested. I did do about 30 minutes meditation, had a little weep from some sensitive self-awareness; and from then I visited a friend 1/2 block away for a short while, and have spent much of aftenoon doing some patio puttering, rearranging the pots and trimming and watering and sweeping.

I am going to have quiet evening, reading. Bubble bath. Early to bed at this campfire.

It was very good to sit down and meditate. That was THE worthwhile activity: Don't just do something: sit there!

So that was my good deed to myself for the day. And the patio looks v. pretty.
My dog and I had a good day together. And the wild horses only snorted and whinnied softly as I meditated. Whoa Nellie!

hey girls--
I had a great day; didn't eat a thing!!! Just water, and lots of it! I was a little hungry, but I was really thirsty! So I drank a lot. I just woke up and still haven't eaten, but I have 2 huge, ripe pears waiting for me. I read the first two chapters in my new meditation book, and in the second page they talk about the mind being like a wild Mustang that wants to go everywhere but where you want it to (Nnneeeiiiggghhhhh!!!) I had to laugh! then I tried to meditate and wound up falling asleep! But a really cool thing happened: I had an incredible urge to do yoga, so I did and felt so energized! Then I danced around my African room. I didn't get much housework done, but I relaxed a lot and took care of the little sick one, who seemed to get better later -- she slept a bunch then ate a bunch; that usually means she's over it. Oh, and I did work on the computer for five hours writing training info for my job. So not a bad day, all in all. It was nice taking a break from food, and David was very supportive! So that was my day. Have a great one!
Sundancer

Elakti, am so happy that you are enjoying meditating so much...and I'm sighing at the mention of your bubblebath. Now that's self-care! I haven't had one of those in...better stop, I might hurt myself trying to remember that! It's been years!!!

Your day sounds like a very enriching and refreshing one; exactly what you needed. That makes me very happy...

Sundancer, did you get what you needed out of the fast? I haven't done a water fast for a while now, but would fast occasionally in my late teens / early 20s, and I remember doing a week-long one once. It was one of the most amazing experiences. I have to work fasting back into my routine...humnnn... just had an idea...I could do one for summer solstice (Fri. 20th)!

I'm glad your little one is better, and that you were able to both relax AND get so much work done! High five!!! I'm drooling at the thought of your African room...*SIGH* At some point when I have my own place I'll have a Moroccan one You had such an energizing day too! The two of you are such inspirations...

As for me - woke up early, did meditation, cold shower, etc. Cleaned up a bit outside on the deck, did some light house-cleaning and finished up some ironing that has been looking me in the face for a few days now...while doing that I was jamming to one of my favorite jazz cds of the moment (you weren't dancing alone, Sundancer). Took a little time to also sort through and get rid of some old paperwork, magazine articles and the like that I'd had put away in a box to go through for weeks, now. Not quite finished, but at the very least I've made a good dent in it...

No walking yesterday - too darned humid - and I did have to work, but I'll try to slip in some upperbody light-weights exercises a little later today, and maybe some slow,easy stretching tonight before bed...

I really think that my taste buds are really awakening now... my salad last night was SO GOOD, and it's one that I 've been having every day for a week or so, now, but it feels like all my pores and cells are expanding and sensitive and just throbbing with new, vibrant life...I just sat and ate, savoring every bite. I didn't even watch TV like I usually would've...it was just me becoming one with the food (chopped Romaine / yellow beet / red bell / 1/2 avocado).

I didn't watch any TV for the whole day yesterday AT ALL!!!

I just enjoyed being in the present so much the thought of doing anything to numb that out did not cross my mind...

____________

DAY 4

Early to rise! Meditations - really beautiful this morning! - cold shower, a little work outside and some light housework. I've already had my OJ and Nana / berry / cherry smoothie, and have a bowl each of grapes and watermelon already prepared to grab when I need them. Light work today for a few hours, but while doing that though I'll be able to read for a bit...

Will check in with you later!

Wow you guys -- this is great!!! Elakti, I hope you are having a GREAT day! Soraya, it sounds like you ARE! My day is almost over, but it was pretty good, other than my daughter relapsing at her grandparents' with wicked diarrhea and my leg aches (I've always had them, no doctor has been able to figure them out, it's hereditary and affected by weather changes -- which sucks in Massachusetts, because the weather is always changing). I started with my pears, then had a salad from the garden. We brought tons of produce to David's parents' and ate all of it (they eat cooked but healthy and lots of raw and cooked veg). I came home and made up some dessert by mixing raw cacao powder, coconut oil and chopped dates mashed up together, then broke up a few pecans and mixed them in. Man, was it decadent!!! Chocolate bliss! :} I've been reading my meditation book throughout the day (it's called How to Meditate and discusses history and other aspects) -- I'm into it.
I feel really good today, lots of gas though. It's okay, I feel my digestive tract getting a good scrubbing with all the good f&v I'm eating. So that's my report to Camp self-care Overhaul! Ciao!

Day 6

Was so busy yesterday, didn't really get a chance to even look too hard at the computer!!! Felt as if I was on a different planet, and in a Zen-like frame of mind as I worked; I can't remember when I've ever felt so focused! It was like controlling time; I got so much more work done in the same timeframe that I would normally do a decent amount of work anyway - and I worked way more slowly and deliberately too! Was quite fun to observe, actually..

Have been feeling very introspective myself, Elakti, so I understand exactly what you are now experiencing, and am thrilled to see that you are just going to flow with that rhythum for a while. We obviously need this time for reflection, so take good advantage of it...

Sundancer, your day sounded fantastic! - and so did your trip into chocolate decadence (I've been scratching my head thinking of what to create for my own special birthday treat, and you've set me on an interesting train of thought...)- I hope that your little one is doing better, now!

I finished off my workday by doing a little ironing while jamming to music - again - and was having so much fun that I just continued the party when I was done brandishing the hot iron. It's fun to throw the hips around and let loose; I did realise when I was singing that I need to give attention to exercising the ol' vocal chords again in earnest. Maybe what I'll do as part of my evening routine this week is to begin working out with my warm-up vocal exercises CD again...been too long since I've done that!

____________________


So far today I've been reading and spent a few moments just sitting in the sun. I'm craving deliberate sunlight exposure but only in small doses in the morning - maybe ten, fifteen minutes at a time - and somehow that feels enough, so I'm listening to my body on this one! I'm still a little puzzled about it, but I'm willing to go with the flow...

I also got an intuitive message that I need to spoil myself with a few invigorating bodyscrubs, so I'll have a look around to see if I can find one with only natural ingredients at the market, or I'll just whip one up of my own (sugar, honey, jojoba...?). My skin could use some pampering and exfoliation as it's detoxing too! I have to be on the lookout for aloe leaves; I want soak the flesh in water and use that solution to wash my face with - it's the perfect cleanser - I wish I could grow my own here!!! My face has been breaking out, and I've been trying not to let it bother me too much, but sometimes it's a little too much to take... ;(

Have also been wondering if I should get a juicer - not too expensive - but I don't plan to juice a whole lot of stuff as I still like the idea of blending and getting all that fiber down. What I WAS thinking of doing is jucing carrots and beets, mainly, then blending greens with the juice to do my version of green smoothies (I can't with fruit anymore, my stomach rebels like anything)...what do you think? And I've always meant to ask, Elakti - what juicer do YOU use?

After a couple of 'happenings' this past weekend and yesterday, I received a revelation last night as to the real purpose behind this period for me; my "Big Why". And yes, I'm focusing on myself truly for the first time in my life!!! And as many issues as Ithought I wanted to learn to deal with in grace and poise, I truly saw for the first time that it boils down to dealing with my ego...

...Fully loving and accepting myself, and living my AUTHENTIC truth, which are NOT the (back)stories that my ego has created in order to justify it's viewpoint...

Living in ego, I feel helpless, frustrated and defenseless, especially when someone expresses a differing opinion on a given topic (the way I'm now eating, perhaps? Got some more of that the past few days ); ego takes it personally, gets defensive and reacts. Living in ego, I've always felt inferior to everyone and undeserving of anything - or anyone - good happening in my life. Feeling this way obviously does not bode very well for a healthy frame of mind or successful life, by any means...

I have to learn how to see myself in the manner in which many other people see me - and there is a major difference between the two perceptions! If I truly was how I perceive myself to be I honestly would not be alive now - and that isn't a metophorical statement. I see that even my taking this time in commitment to myself is boosting my lagging self-confidence in ways that nothing else could...

So that is the brief version of my explanation - I hope it's clear enough! - as to the foundational WHY of my 40 day stay in Camp Self-Care Overhaul!!!

I hope you ladies have a rewarding day...I'm back to my book; maybe I'll journal for a bit, and then have something to eat...taking it easy myself today...

MUCH {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{LOVE}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} to you both, and thank you for all of your support!

Many Blessings!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 06/17/2008 04:27PM by Soraya.

Soraya, glad you are having such good days and insights, and having good "taking it easy" day. Me too! I have been having quiet time a lot lately, and sometimes I report a bit of depression, but it really is more apt to say it is some "face to face" with myself. Sometimes it is not so pleasant to look at oneself and feel some feelings that would ordinarily be stuffed with SAD comfort food or other run-away-quick schemes.

Yes, the ego. Ugh. A big subject. The most small petty minuscule gargantuan monstrosity EVER! Huge-mongous pipsqueek terror! Instead of being a tool to function in this place, it has out and out taken over. Part of the problems I am having at work is because of ego, and it is not easy to unravel the ego from the "what is". There is the job. It is a certain way with certain characteristics. It is my ego in the job that is causing so much problem, butting up against other egos, too!, and then there is an element of self-esteem and lack of fulfillment emotionally----but I think that is another issue, meaning I cannot expect this particular job to be anything but what it is and I need to adapt or get out. There are other issues I personally am going through and they are butting up against the inappropriate lens of this particular job. EEEgads, did you follow that? I am on a tangent.

So! I am happy to hear you are having an easy going day, and about your insights. You are taking time now to help yourself and that is so good, and you deserve it. It is important to regenerate ourselves in this positive way.
You sound like the type of person who helps others a lot. Now you for You!

I know what you mean when you talk about the confusion and frustration of ego, and self-attitude, not deserving anything good, feeling inferior. That's not real either. As you said somewhere, it is "stories" the mind has been playing and they are fictional, not us. I had a terrible problem of self-hatred, and it is very much out of the picture...just a recent miracle (!!) That was so much pain. I feel quite different now, but still struggling with so much, and also getting the energy to really flow positively and DO what I need to do to cultivate more loving positive feelings. It's like...for example...my self-hatred and feelings of inferiority kept me down, undeserving, and in such a job situation as I am in now. I may have hated it, just like I do now, but now I am really kicking and screaming as if to say, "hey, what am I still doing here, I think more of myself now than to go through this!!" and there is some adjustment to be done, fine-tuning, accepting, or change of jobs through self-discovery. I don't know quite what, quite not yet. On one hand, heck, I just want to retire. And, I truly am seeking a high level of contentment with myself so that I could even work where I am now with POISE AND EQUINIMITY. That is the kind of peace I want. LOFTY IDEAL!! Oh, another tangent.

I cut open the watermelon, and it is good. I will be eating watermelon this afternoon. I am having a hungry day. I am going to make a big salad for later, make salad dressing. A multi ingredient salad...I am so hungry.

I use a Breville juicer which I like quite well. It is very easy to use and to clean up....the "big chore" which is really easy and quick. I do like veg juice, and figured on trying it on for size, but have not been consistent.

Do you have a vita-mix? And did you say you don't like green smoothies?

Sundancer, you too are an inspiration! Your last posts so upbeat and you are doing such good things and it sounds like you are having a great time....dancing and doing yoga! I need to do more physical. I am going to get soon a boombox or something so I can start listening to music. I love LOVE music (and broad appreciation, too) and I miss it. I used to play favorite classical pieces and do mock ballet around the house. Years ago. I think this would be a natural way for me to move...dance. I want music! I would listen to Satie, Brahms, Liszt, Chopin, Willie Neslson, K.D. Lang, and Michael Jackson to name a few! Isn't yoga great? (I need to do it!) What kind do you do?


Take care you two...you are! You're in camp Self-Care, Self-Love!

Hey Chickies!!
I love Camp Self-Care,Self-Love! Man, I had another great day! My little one is better, but now the hubby has the flu. :{ We had a farmers market to do and the poor guy was wilting. So he went to bed early and my little girl and I were dancing for hours! It's so funny to see your kid develop traits that you love about yourself! I went through the music song by song letting her pick, and she picked all the ones I liked and skipped all the ones I didn't want to hear! The music was very beautiful, and there was a lot of spinning / chakra clearing going on. We had a blast!

I ate all raw today. I had another huge pear (these things must weigh almost a pound each!) and a ginger kombucha for breakfast, then went to the Y, worked out, made some hummus and ate it all. I made the last third of a cup into an awesome dressing with some ginger and soy sauce and a little olive oil. Had that on my giant salad of market leftovers for dinner. Oh, yeah, I made these delicious nori rolls for lunch with the hummus and was helping David load the truck for market, and while I was outside my two cats got my nori rolls!!! So I just cut up a tomato and threw it into some hummus and that was actually pretty good.

I'm still feeling the positive effects of the little fast I did. I want to do another one soon. I'm really loving how I'm feeling without the heaviness of cooked food. Fasting made me more mindful of what I put into my mouth, more willing to really analyze whether and how the particular food is inclined to make me feel.

Soraya and Elakti, as much fun as these days are that are filled with bliss, the days that we spend in quiet contemplation are equally precious in the lessons they teach us. They help to balance us and cause us to grow. I'm glad we are all doing well, and this camp rocks! I could share a lot more, but this day has been full, and I'm done!

G'nite!

Sundancer

Hi Dancing Spirits~~lovely goings on!! (except Sundancer's hubby has flu)

I'm off to work. Woke up at 6, but went back to sleep at 7 and slept another 2 hours 10 minutes and it was such a beautiful sleep. Am I well rested, and feel quite good. I lost another 2 pounds...180 now!

Have great day!

Hello you two

Just thinking about you; hoping all is well in your neck of the woods.


I plan on getting a good sleep tonight! On waking refreshed and prepared to meet whatever the day brings---and on bringing something positive to it!

~~~E.

Day 9

Still on track; just in a very contemplative space right now and have been quiet and "cocooned" so to speak...

Lots of studying material read already but am now gleaning deeper understanding of certain topics and issues... really neat stuff. I am so grateful (Gratitude! One of my mainstays especially at this time!) for this time...this commitment to myself...and the beautiful, courageous women (and anyone else, unbeknownest to me) who have also decided to turn the focus on their own self-nurturing...

Today has been, and will continue to be, a bed day. Feeling very tired; suspect it may also have something to do with a certain monthly blessing showing up . So I'm taking it easy - don't have much of a choice! Will try to show up tomorrow to give some kind of report and to respond to the ladies' last posts, which were great...

Good evening, good folk...sweet dreams, until we meet again...

Peace out!

Ahhhh, there's nothing like good sleep, so regenerative. I had, besides my good sleep last night, a wonderful little nap of only 40 minutes, but it felt like hours. I am so relaxed. And I just had a treat: a papaya.

I hope you had a good night's rest. And, isn't it a blessing to take time to yourself for good purpose, quiet restorative time? Looking forward to hearing more from you.

I am grateful for you two also. I sure enjoy our online "camp" and all the support and motivation/inspiration.

Me too! This camp has been very helpful to me. I was thinking about it yesterday and came up with the thought that this is the epitome of support!

So now it's my turn to be under the weather. I don't have the flu though, just a cold and no voice -- work will be interesting! I need my voice to work (I'm a server in a fancy restaurant). I feel pretty good, other than a sore throat, so I'm sipping tea this morning.

I did something I haven't done in a while -- I ate a little cooked food: about 3/4 cup of organic whole grain rice with asparagus and 1/2 cup cooked squash. I was really full from it and still am not hungry. Other than that, I've been eating really well! I've been making recipes. The one thing that isn't raw that I've been allowing myself (yes, girls, last night was a slip-up, but a minor one) is chipotles. I've been making some amazing food with that being my only unraw ingredient. I also think I'm dropping some unwanted weight. Until I went 95% raw, I couldn't get below 183. I weighed myself Tuesday and was 176, and I think I'm less now -- hooray! My favorite weight for myself is 150. I'm 5'71/2" and solid, so 150 is slim but healthy. I can wear a size 6 at 150 if I work out (which I do, but not enough). I'm a size 12 now.

I love bed days! I never get them any more unless I'm sick.

I'm going to have to go get some echinacea tincture so I can make it through the day. Have a great one!!!
Sundancer

Day 10

Ekakti, you are so precious
You so got what I was trying to say, and yes, you made absolutely perfect sense (re. post on 17th, above). When I read that I so wished you were around so I could give you a giant hug...

And the level of contentment and peace that you desire may seem a lofty ideal at times, but it is attainable, and a most worthy goal...

I love to read your posts; your writing style is so real and yet so 'poetic' at times... You make me laugh, you touch my soul... I hope that one day we'll be able to have a real conversation or two ( all of the previous applies to you too, Sundancer)!

And talking about Sundancer...so sorry to hear that you weren't feeling well yourself; oh dear! I gather work will be / was interesting, what with no voice, but I hope everything works out okay.

It's so sweet and endearing to see how much fun you have with your little one; enjoy her now! I know you know how fast children can grow up...

You seem to be doing well foodwise so don't be hard on yourself about the cooked food you had; any "slip-ups" or occasions where we may not take the / our prefered course of action at the time is still an important part of our journey. Also, as DZM might say," Also look at what you're NOT eating, you know? Move at your own pace, evaluate your OWN goals...there ARE no food police!" ***Can you tell that I admire the man?!***

Way to go on releasing 7+ lbs! Looking forward to seeing more of you here later...

________________

I was SOOOOO out of it last night; I had a migrane of epic proportions and barely knew which way was up. Haven't had one of those beasts in ages and had forgotten how insanely horrible it feels to have one...ughhh. I remembered that I'd also eaten something the previous night that did NOT agree with me, and I know that was a large root cause of the pain...Did manage to do the night time chakra clearing meditation, though, but not the good morning one - no energy at all for that one!

I must say that I've had a great day, though I still have a half-strength migraine hanging around and sitting in front of a computer is one of the worse things I could be doing right now! I won't be long, and I'll be heading right to bed, I promise...I've been doing the bed thing again for a good part of the day...

Woke up feeling mostly human and markedly better so after throwing a load into the washing machine I dragged my butt to the store (Sundancer, when I read about you taking part in a Farmer's Market I just about lost my chin to the floor...can't remember the last time I could get to one of those things!). I am SOOOOOO glad I went...

FIGS!!!!!

We got figs in!!!

***Sings and does the funky dance of supreme joy***

I have been craving... wishing for... drooling over the thought of FIGS since they went out of season last year, and I can't do dried fruit - WAY too sweet and rich for my delicate tummy - so you can imagine how I just about lost my mind when I saw fresh figs on display. After doing a triple take, I grabbed a bag and took about 16 of those delectable succulents home with me (and I just finished inhaling about 6 of them...yummmmm - O!) They were NOT CHEAP but if there is one item that I will treat myself to this season - it's figs!

Also grabbed about 27 large Navel oranges (man was that bag heavy...I had to put it down about five times during my very slowww walk home), two bunches nanas, few Romaine hearts, some kale, Swiss chard (not usual for me at all), some baby cukes, a cauliflower head, frozen mixed berries, blueberries, cherries and some flaxseed, which I haven't had in eons and hope that I can still have without getting sick...

In between laundry loads I've been laying in bed trying to evict this headache...so far to no avail...but I'll keep trying! I'll stop here for now, maybe have a light salad and continue taking it easy for the rest of the night - no more computer, no TV, tie my eyes down and chill...

Have a great night!

Hi hi hi. Sorry to hear about the sore throat and headache...hope you are both feeling better. The migraine is bad news really (I trust your sore throat didn't escalate, Sundancer)...I had a true migraine only once in my life, decades ago, and I still can recall it. Wow. Sounds like it is on its way out.

I noticed a big fig tree that is hanging over an alley fence...tiny figs there...I have made a note to keep an eye on it! This morn. on way to work, I pass two cherimoya trees and the houseowner was outside so I talked to him about the trees (and the fruit!). He said it varies year to year how much fruit they bear. A few months ago I saw a couple fruit on it, but didn't take---I now have his permission to take a couple when there is another crop. He told me that the flowers can only be pollinated on one particular day (!) and only by particular wasp, one that is not too native to San Diego! Well, I think there are a few of these wasps. There were some local cherimoyas at People's.

I am not too crazy about figs, but I am going to try them again. It's good to keep checking!

I had an okay day, for not being fired. I was a little disappointed.
Had fruit this a.m., salad for lunch, and a honeydew melon after work (so far). Do not feel hungry after the melon. These are not my favorites, but I got them at People's (so organic) because they were smallish and a special price. It was okay, juicey, and I'm sure full of good things for my cells.

Sundancer, your little meander into cooked food was not bad at all! I occasionally have some croutons on salad which is kind of bad! Brown rice and asparagus is much better. Is the sore throat related? Sometimes when I eat the croutons on salad and maybe there is a bit of feta or goat cheese I notice some little symptoms arise. Or, maybe it is part of your weight loss (hooray!). I notice my body is shedding pounds in waves...and everytime there is a sloughing off of pounds there is a bit of detox felt in my system. I guess as the waste and toxins in that fat and cells are being purged out.

Soraya, what do you do with flaxseeds? I bought some...intention is to make flaxseed tea, which is s/b soothing to the bowel.

Thank you for the compliment. I love reading you and Sundancer, too!!!

I do hope very much that you two are feeling better. Keep on keeping on!
Chew chew chew!

Hey girls!!

Soraya -- sorry to hear about the migraine! My mom, sister and son all get them. Although I have never had one, I know how debilitating they can be. Sleep seems to be the best thing for my family.

Thank you both for all the support!!! :} I don't feel really bad about eating the cooked food, but I'm really glad my body didn't seem to be glad to have ingested it. It was kind of like what eating meat was like right when I was going veg several years ago. Sat in my stomach and made me feel heavy, but not poisoned. Today was interesting at work. Fortunately, my throat is just the tiniest bit sore; I just sounded awful. But I croaked my way through the shift and all is good. I'm really proud of myself for not eating cooked food at work. I didn't eat at all except a few grapes and a little veggies off a crudite plate. I was wondering if the throat is a detox symptom. My nose has been a little congested also. Hmmm...

I'm with you, Soraya -- I love figs!!! They're so filling and delicious! You feel like you had a real meal when you eat them!

OMG Elakti -- I got fired from a job once about 9 years ago. I really hated but needed the job, and when I was fired I was devastated, until I got up the next day and realized that I didn't have to go back. Then I was overjoyed! I just thought of that when I read your post. I don't know if it's reassuring to you or not, but thinking about it was funny to me.

I grind a couple of tablespoons of flax seeds up every morning and put them in my breakfast smoothies. It makes them really satisfying, and I'm one of those people who cannot get too much fiber, if you know what I mean.

Well, chickies, hope your day tomorrow is fab! I work again -- thought I had it off, but the schedule was changed. I'm glad, because I need the money (going to Cali in August!)
TTFN
Sundancer

Short post: long, prductive day!

Elakti, I had a feeling you weren't going to be fired! I can understand your feeling a wee disappointed... Was thinking of puuting flaxseed into my smoothies...may try doing just green ones. I have a Vita-mix - got it about 11 years ago when I had more money to spare for things like that - and LIVED on green smoothies with fruit in the first few months of my foray into raw; unfortunately, my stomache will NOT tolerate the fruit / greens combination anymore...

I don't like to eat a lot of greens, but loved blending them with fruit and I used to pack them in...don't know how I'll like the taste of all greens, though. I don't have a juicer, so can't explore that -though I don't know how I'd tolerate juices now either. I experimented yesterday with blending carrots in a little water, straining it and then blending the greens in the carrot juice, but even though the juice was diluted with water I still found it a bit sweet for my tastes...isn't that odd?

Sundancer, I'm glad to hear your throat wasn't that painful, but you must've sounded lovely at work! Feel better - and I hope your husband's still improving too!

_____________

Day 11

Woke up...meditated...oil pulled...brushed teeth with toothsoap...showered...

;-)

After morning OJ I threw another load in laundry and did quite a few things around the house for a few hours. In between had a nana-berry-cherry smoothie, water, watermelon and a kale-avocado salad.

Spent some time on the computer and finally joined a support group for people with "invisble" illnesses - a way to interact with other people who have Multiple Chemical Sensitivities (and hopefully some with EMF issues as well)...something which I should have done for myself a LONG time ago...

Just finished a nana-berry-cherry-pineapple smoothie, and it looks like figs for dinner tonight

Feeling zonked after so much computer time...but at least it's not as bad as a year or so ago when I'd get sick if I spent more than ten minutes on the computer... big blessings...

Hope you've both had a good day as well...talk to you again soon...

Good Night, all!

Miles of smiles ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Just saying hello. I'm fine, home early, eating grapes. Going to patio amidst the flowers, probable parrots (they come feed about this time on some fir tree berries overhanging patio), dogs, cats, ...and grapes.

Hey girls!

Soraya, my customers told me I sounded sultry and my coworkers were joking with me about 900 numbers. So we all had a good laugh. I'm still sounding a bit rough and have a bit of congestion, but I also ate (gack!) creme brulee at work, so I'm thinking my body's telling me WTF!!! Thanks bod! I woke up this morning craving a salad, so that's what I had for breakfast. Other than that mishap, I'm doing well. I think I'll go to the Y in a bit and work out. I don't have a scale and haven't weighed myself in a week and am curious. I'd love to be in the 150's by the time I go to Cali in a couple of months. I'm reading my meditation book and learning a lot that I didn't know. I also am considering another 36 hour water fast on Wednesday, because the last one did me so much good!

Today is a house cleaning day, and I have to work tonight. Then I have four days off! Not good financially, but time-wise, it's great!

The little one is awake (she slept in because she was up a lot last night with an earache), so I'm going to cut this short. Have an awesome day!!!

Sundancer

Day 12

Another short one...have a salad downstairs waiting for my undivided attention!!!!

Elakti, what a way to spend an evening!!! Dining with nature, accompanied by parrots...

Sundancer, I'm sure you must have sounded quite seductive...LOL... hope Little is better, earaches are no joke... enjoy your days off! I know you'll make great use of them!

Today was just basically work, which I am actually enjoying again these days...just finished some ironing and now off to ravish a simple salad...after that I have to do my gratitude journal entries and continue to delve into my Osho book, "Awareness".

Love ya MUCH!!!!!!!!

Oh, Matt Monarch mentions Osho in his first book, Raw Success. I'd never heard of him before. I must look at Osho.

Sundancer...glad you have 4 days off...enjoy! I'm all for days off, you know!

Soraya...do you have a notebook where you write what you're grateful about? Do you just make a list or write more?
It sounds so positive.

I am feeling very good today, and have day off tomorrow, hooray hooray. I plan to make the most of it, do good things, eat well.

Hello dear lady, hope you have a good day. How is the writing coming along?

Dear Sundancer, today starts your four days off? Enjoy!!!! Let us know how you're doing, too.

Day 14

I am having the most WONDERFUL day, Elakti; thank you!

Sundancer, looking forward to hearing your plans for / what you achieve during your four days off!

Let's see... had OJ for brekkie; large nana-berry-pineapple smoothie when I got home from errands (more about that in a sec), @ 14 figs for a light snack which were super ripe and SOOOO good, and just finished demolishing a Romaine-golden beet-avocado salad. Thinking about more OJ in a bit but we'll see...

Osho is phenomenal! A lot of what Eckhardt Tolle talks about in "A New Earth" is stuff that Osho delved into so deeply into in "Awareness.." that it is "insane"...you can't read Osho if you're not open minded and prepared to challenge everything you've ever learned or believed - LOVE him!!! Makes me think...helps me transform my thinking...

In my gratitude journal I write more; sometimes I end up with two,three or more pages of stuff that ends up morphing into lessons learned, etc...sometimes I find this practice more insightful and revealatory that writing in my regular journal, so I haven't done that in days!

Writing last night was FUN!!! I think I may have mentioned before that there is a bigger writing project I've set for myself - book / series of books offshooting from another story idea I've been living with for a long time, now - but I've been stuck and couldn't get going on a regular basis... Yesterday, however, I just got the push to write something else, something shorter and just for the hell of it, for FUN...like when we were kids; we'd just do something just because we loved it, you know? And not (over)think everything...we'd just get in the zone and lose ourselves in the process... I knew it would get me out of the creative rut as well. So I just chose a beginning point and dove in. I am so looking forward to continuing this piece that I get excited just thinking about it!!!

Okay, my errands...I'd mentioned a few posts ago about getting graphics together for T shirt designs as one of my aims during Camp Self-Care?

Well, I took my buttukus down to a printing company not far from me today on an information gathering mission...I've ended up with my fire completely stoked and up at least 1000% more degrees! SO I'm going to be working on a few designs for shirts and bags, and I'll be incorporating my artwork and some poetry / inspirational stuff. I'll be getting a few more art supplies - inks, paper and the like - and getting to work from this weekend. The best part? I've wanted to do this for years, but with most operations it just costs so much to get stuff done and I don't have a lot of capital to play with - to get the clothes / shirts and prints is even affodable to ME! I can actually attain this dream without having to depend on other people for help... I've been dancing at odd moments all through the day out of sheer JOY!!!

***Does funky dance of joy again***

I'm so happygratefulcontent that I don't know what the heck to do with myself...



I also grabbed a couple books that kinda triggered some new design ideas, and picked up a few things from the market...like more figs ;-)

Tonight I'll break my TV fast to watch my beloved "So You Think You Can Dance", write in my journal, do my meditation(s) and go to sleep - I'll do more writing on my short story tomorrow night / most of the day Friday...

Oh, one more thing...

From Friday I'll have roughly a week all to myself - I'll be house/pet sitting and I can write, draw/paint, study, exercise to my heart's content!!! If I could do cartwheels, I'd be doing a few right about now...

*** Funky. Dance. Funky. Dance ***

I love my life!!!

Sending lots of love to you!!!

Wow Soraya -- I'm glad you had such a great day! I've been in a little funk myself: not eating 100% or even 80% raw, more like 70%. I have heartburn and cannot get motivated to clean my house or do art. I'm working, but the bills are coming in faster than the money, and my job is soooooooo not what I want to be doing with my life. Last night I went to my songwriting class and had to confess that I couldn't write words to this beautiful melody that fits my daughter because I have resentment issues about raising kids again at this stage in my life, and this feeling is stealing not only the positive words that I know are there on some level, but the joy that this beautiful creature should be (and usually is) giving me. I did do yoga yesterday though.

I'm really happy that you are doing something with your creative energy. It's important to not let that slip away, which is an easy thing to do.

I'm hoping to pull myself out of this funk today and do something fun with my beautiful daughter. She has an end of school year event at her school today. That should be a kick.

I hope you both have a great day!!!

Love, Sundancer

Sundancer,

I hope you have an awesome time with your daughter later. Thank you for being so honest about how you are / have been feeling; I don't know what else to say besides that my heart goes out to you...

I've been so there re. low/no motivation (lived there for a WHILE), not enough money, unhappy waith SO many jobs that I took only because I was desperate, not because that was what I really wanted to do...sigh...I guess you just have to believe that things will get better, and prepare yourself for it somehow...

Your confession is interesting in that I was going to ask you how you felt having such a young daughter when you revealed that you were also a grandmother - I had to read that part of your post twice! Grandmother?!? I just wanted you to know that you have my support and I'm sending all the good vibes I can your way today! Please let me know how everything went later, okay?