thanks sapphire,

I just started feeling depressed two days ago and I don't know why. I do have some family things that are not so great but I will work it out some how. I have been tired too.

I am still eating raw foods and feeling great about that

Grapes are in now and I love raw almond butter with celery sticks. I started the morning with some fresh blackberries which are in season but for some reason my appitite was not so great. I tried a pear but it was mealy not juicy. I decided to take a nap I don't feel real sick but I don't feel all that great either.

I tried to make a soup with some tomato avacado bell pepper and a leaf of romaine lettuce and a hot pepper but it really didnt taste that great the texture was not good but the flavor was o.k. I will have to experiment some more. I did make some raw spagetti sauce that was so good but I don't have any more dehydrated tomatoes. I have been experimenting with different things.

I'm tired now got ot go
Pam

I am still raw. I have not been quitting my eating time at 5 p.m. lately and am feeling the difference. I hope to start juicing today as I do feel good when I have at least a glass of fresh juice. Perhaps I will make a green smoothie as well. I got a jar of almond butter a while back and have been eating that spread on celery. I am thinking the almond butter is not a great choice for food and perhaps the almonds and nuts have been playing a part in how I have been feeling. I think I feel better when I eat more greens. I don't have any more watermellons and really feel lost now because eating the mellon was a big part of my diet. I do have a small box of pears but that is not as filling as a mellon.

I am noticing my skin is starting to show sighns of eating raw. It is starting to feel smoother and the color is not as red in places expecially my face. I really missed my skin being soft while eating cooked foods.

I hope this depression feeling is going to be short lived. Somehow I will pull out of it.

Life is better raw
Pam

Hi Pampam. It sounds like you are doing prettty well these days. I am interested in reading the Zavasta book, and will get it eventually. (Right now am in dire straits, looking for work, etc. I even toyed with idea of charging the book, because that is how I am---so impractical)

I am wondering if you could tell me a little more about this thing "quantum eating"? Just some basics? I gather it involves less eating (omg) or not eating in evening/night. What are any other salient points? I am just so curious about it, I see it is quite a thick book and am anxious to read it!

I can't think of eating less right now! I have to rein myself in and get back to predominantly raw, have lapsed and am not eating so well lately due to stress of life's situation. I had made concessions as I stopped smoking, but now am back to smoking and am saddled again with changing the eating back to high raw. I actually want to get back to 100% as that seems the best for me...just not mess around with anything but all raw. I'm happier and healthier 100% raw. Again quit when my financial situation gets better and I don't wonder if I am going to be living under a tree and foraging in people's yards! Seriously, I know it will all work out.

Anyway, take care. You sound really good!
Elakti

Hey Pam!

Keep up the great work. I bet if you stay focussed on your goals and keeping raw, over time, that depression thing will just finally start to fade away. Do you have a friend you like to visit or who you like to have come for a visit? I find a lot of time, just spending time with people who I really like a lot lifts my spirits.

That quantum eating thing sounds interesting. I have never read it either, and I have spent too much money on raw books, so I just can't order another one, at least for a while. I'd love to hear more about it as well.

Have a great day!

Sapphire

Good to hear from you sapphire ane elakti,
I still am feeling a bit in a slump but it seems to be shifting towards something I can work on. I am talking about this depression I am feeling. You see I do have many situations that need work on besides my eating and weight. I just got to get up and start working out those issues.

I lost 1.4 pounds for the week.

I have a lot to lose but eating raw foods makes it seem so easy I don't have to count callories or weigh my food I just eat anything as long as it is not cooked.

Yesterday I did have some popcorn. For some reason I just wanted something to munch on I figure popcorn is great for transition. I did not put any butter on it just plain popcorn. I had to get a watermellon because I missed it so they are getting old and this one was not so great in comparison to the ones from oregon but it seemed to hit the spot.

I had three birthday cakes I had to not partake in this week two of them I made and during my daughters party I baked pizza for the kids and the vegitable pizza was hard to resist. I was very tempted to have some but I know I would basically have a hard time to get back on track. I don't know if I would ever be able to partake in eating cooked foods, it is so hard to switch back and forth. I don't want to lose what I have worked for thus far by eating a pizza. I still have a lot of weight to lose and I still have high blood preasure so I think eating this way is best for me at this time.

I have not been working so much on the Quantum Eating lately but I still am amazed with the book. I think eating less is best but I still have some work on just plain eating raw at this time.

In Tanyas book she covers many issues concerning ageing and has some very different thearies she lives by. She is very big on skin brushing and has her own line of skin cream, I purchased a jar and it is by far the best lotion I have found since being raw. The book covers excersize, breathing, sleaping and many different issues. I am going to have to read that book several times in order to really understand what this amazing woman has to share. She had so many health issues to deal with and so many opperations and has so much internal strength that reading the things she says are very incourageing and inspirational for me. For me the book was worth the cost.

kudos to you for resisting the temptation...you are STRONG! Your dedication to yourself shines through. I wouldn't be so strong------if I had to cook for others.....omg.

I sympathize with the depression. I know very much what it is like to get depressed. Not so much these days, but I have a history of it and am familiar with it. What do you do to feel better? Exercize definitely helps tremendously, as do friends, activities with friends or even alone. Happy music...and dance! I hope you feel better soon.

I am really curious about that book. How I love to read books on rawfoodism! Especially when I slump a bit and need another boost...another book....I have a big library!

Take care, feel better, you're doing great! Dry popcorn is a good concession, not so bad at all, imo. Better than I was doing lately! Today, all raw so far. A lot of fruit, and a salad. I have a melon to open...cross my fingers, I hope it is good.

Hi Pam:

Hope all is well for you.

I went to Tanya's website and read up about that book - it looks like a really good book. One of these days, I am sure I will get my hands on a copy.

Have a terrific day!

Sapphire

Hi Pam!

I"m glad you are still here posting and working on your health issues..me too!

You might like reading about Gerson's health protocol..it's very interesting. I love it..and have borrowed the book his daughter Charlotte wrote in I think 2002 or 2004.

You take care, stay as raw as you can, and check out Gerson if you haven't already.

Love,
Prism

great to see you posting again prisim, I am so glad to hear you are doing well in California.

I caved in and ate some cooked food. I thought I could just eat something and fall back into eating raw. I really was feeling hungry and also was depressed. I started eating other things after eating something cooked. I don't feel as if I binged but I was falling away from eating raw. This lasted three days. I cannot explaine just why I did this but right now I am fasting and trying to work out this in my mind. I don't know how some of these people can just start eating raw foods and not look back. There are times I want to have something cooked. I dont want to be so strict on myself though. There is so much to learn about this way of eating, There are so many issues and so many people have conflicting things about eating raw, sometimes it can get confuseing. I love how I feel when eating raw. I still have to be carefull concerning my high blood preasure issue. I still have weight to lose.

I have been fasting for the past two days.

I fasted for two days and had my weigh in today. I gained .2 oz. I would have wished for a loss but at lease I did not gain to much.

I went for a long walk and found some blackberries yum So I broke my fast on blackberries. Later I had a banana pear, apple and more blackberries. I feel satisfied with exersize and full tonight.

I am ready for the week of eating raw.

I got some kale fresh from a garden, oh happy day, and I still have some wild nettles growing in the yard. I hope to eat them in a smoothy tomorrow. I hope to increase my exersize this week. Lets see how that goes

feeling better
Pam

hugs to you pampam keep up the good work and keep thinking positive no matter what you can do whatever you set yer mind too !

...Jodi, the banana eating buddhist

I was just wondering where you have been jgun. I have missed your posts. How have you been?

Glad to hear you are getting back on track Pam. And you are totally doing the right thing when you find ways to exercise. I am sure I have heard that one of the most effective treatments for depression is exercise, although I bet the drug companies wouldn't want you to know that, ha ha!!

Just don't forget your goal and you will keep yourself moving in the right direction!

Sapphire

hi sapphire thanks for the encourageing words

I just had a green smoothie with some garden fresh kale and mango and frozen banana. The smoothie was very pulpy so I had to chew it but the flavor was good.

I had a apple in the morning

I am getting ready to take my grand baby for a walk and hope to get some things done in the garden later.
the weather is going for a change from sunney to rain later this week so I hope to be out doors much today.

I felt more energetic after my walk yesterday so lets see how today fares for me.

Hi Pam!

Keep up and keep posting..it was something that I've missed doing, but now am able to post more often..so I'm veryyyy happy!

I hope you will at least check out the Gerson Therapy books and or their website, or info. at curezone.org..there is a Gerson forum with info.

You can do his diet of some raw, some cooked but always with an emphasis on green juices, and fresh fruits and fruit drinks. I think too the supplements are good for people like us..for a while anyway. I'm doing Iodine anyway, and adding in potassium and taking away the salt/sodium is helping with my last remaining health issues it seems. His protocol makes lots of sense to me and the foods are right on target with what I like to eat which is weird. He advocates to not eat meat or dairy but later on for those non-raw folks they can incorporate very minute amounts of them if they want..I prefer to no do that of course.

Baked potaotes I do like sometimes if I feel like a cooked item..that with steamed veggies..no butter or fat, salt or pepper.

I have my fruit and veggie bowl in my room for snacks, distilled water, and this helps me a lot.

Have a great week! Eat lots of fresh raw foods..yummy still this time of year!

Love,
Prism

a couple of days ago I went on a binge and have not given much fight to regain my raw eating. In many ways this was due to a very emotional situation with a family member and I just went for the food to shove down my emotions. It is very imature on my part and not helping me one bit. Somehow I am going to get a grip on this eating but I just don't know the key to my eating. I wish I did. It seems that when eating raw so many past emotions arise but this was a situation that was just in my face. I wish I could change some things in my life but feel I cant. So I have not been eating raw.

It's ok, you are in a difficult position and sometimes it's just overwhelming. Sometimes we just need one of those down days..and let our emotions come out.

I have been there myself, and so I can empathize with you

Be good to yourself, we love ya!

Love,
Prism

Thanks, prisim, The good thoughts make me feel better.
On a positive noat, fresh fruit is ripening on the trees in my area and I usually cruise on craigs list searching for posts on free fruit. I got this huge box of grapes and another box of pears. I am going to try to juice some of the grapes and freeze it in Ice cube trays for smoothies. Its so many grapes that I will have to do that. The grapes are rather tart and not like thompson grapes but they are still tasty and the pears are the kind that have a thick dark skin and they are hard right now so it will take them a while to ripen. I cant remember the name of the pears. I am still not eating raw but one thing I have to say is eating cooked foods I get thirsty a lot and I have been getting mild headachs and stomach aches. I thought I was going to start going raw again this morning but I did not eat anything and got to hungry so I ate whatever was available.

hi Pam ... my grapevine is bursting with grapes too .. green and purples .. but there still a day or two away i think .. really looking forward to doing *something* with them this year lol

im sorry your having a rough few days but just brush yourself off an carry on

i notice you have been yoyoing alot this year and wonder if you have identified what it is that keeps making you fall off the fruit cart ?

and what are your plans next time to avoid those problems?

...Jodi, the banana eating buddhist

Jgun so good to have you here. I am not sure what my problem is. I have some self esteme issues. I start doing well and feeling better but then I seem to blow it in some way or another. This time I had a spat with my youngest daughters father. It was a stupid spat when I think of it but in some way I felt useless after the fight. I spiraled fast and headed for the kitchen to eat anything without useing any constraints whatsoever. A real imature move on my part. I think I eat cooked foods and it supresses emotions a kind of numbing effect.

I have been yoyoing a lot.

ok Pam ! well sorry to hear that .. try not to let him steal your energy like that ... if he cant talk to you ina cival way (and is oftenn the case with ex's they dont want too) then perhaps just avoid any contact with him thats not neccessary ..do you share custody and get child support ?

toxic people arent worth getting thrown into an emotional loop

keep working at breaking that chain of conflict = anxiety = bingeing , as soon as you can do that you will feel so much better, its hard to do but keep trying !!

pam are you single mom with all your kids living with you still?

on another note ..

how did your garden fare this year ? so much wetness up here .. but i gotta bumpercrop of zuchini that still i keep picking lol

everybodys getting zuchini for xmas

...Jodi, the banana eating buddhist




Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/06/2008 08:45PM by Jgunn.

another thing ive noticed pam ... is you hardly ever post about rewarding yourself for all the hard work you put into this despite your failures you need to cut yourself some slack and give yourself a treat

if that means indulging in something you have never done before or buying yourself something nice or treating yourself to a massage or what have you .. you need to do somethign for yourself for once and damn everyone else (yes even the kids sorry if that hurts lol) you deserve it so much

hard work without reward is just toil and tedium

hard work with reward is joyous and helps you look forward to tommorrow with gusto instead of dread

...Jodi, the banana eating buddhist

pam i was just thinking also .. i cant help but wonder if perhaps you need more support then this board gives you ... you writing often comes from what seems like a lonely place (ouch sorry if that hurt its just an observation) and you saying you have self esteem issues makes me think that you are lonely and could use some more *physical* support then what a forum or 2 can give you

this is a great site i found recently that has all sorts of interesting things: for instance if you type in your zip code (im not sure where you live except around mt.ranier so i typed in a morton,wa zip)

[www.meetup.com]

and you get like 150 things to do around that area . just in the health link alone ! and there is so many other interest based meetings

get out an meet some like minded people in what you are insterested in , it may help you achieve your goals .. sometimes its hard to do alone

love ya !

...Jodi, the banana eating buddhist

pampam i hope you are having a wonderfull day and trying to enjoy at least a few of these rays of sunshine attempting to poke thru the clouds lol !

hi pampam!
Thought I'd pop over here and say hello seeing as you've been so nice as to do it for me. I've been yo yoing a lot and numbing myself up with food, there's too many of us doing that! There's so many people caught in that process, we all need to freakin chill out and stop!! hehe . I know you will get through this, in the mean time I send you good thoughts. Enjoy your grapes.
Gogrow and be merry

jody, you are such a intutitive person. Thank-you for your words.

I have been doing better these past three days.

I have been on this health journey since june of 2007 and have gotten in a on again of again raw to sad food swing. I have felt the wonderfull freedom of eating raw foods and cannot deny the plusses that come from eating uncooked foods. Most aches and pains in my lower back, left shoulder and joints went away from eating raw foods. I notice a lifting of my spirits when I am eating raw that makes me feel so wonderful that I begin to look out to the world and can feel a growing love come from within. That sounds real mushey but that is how I feel when I eat raw foods. It is so hard to walk this path. There are not many people who want to join my walk and deny themself the pleasure of cooked foods. Since I have started this health walk different family members have made some steps towards their health, My 14 yr old daughter has decided to stop eating meat she says she does not want to eat their fear. My oldest daughter is toying with the thought of going raw but is pregnant right now and wants to eat everything in sight but she still drinks smoothies and juices. my youngest is 11 and loves being a "carnivor" but I am challenging her to stop eating so much in sweets and soda pop. The whole family is now beginning to learn the effects what we put in our bodies and how we feel from it. If I did not make these steps towards my own health my children wouln not even think of eating to make themselves feel better. This is good.

I did quit smoking and am solid on that step towards health. I feel the wheatgrass juice did me good in helping me quit smoking. Now every time I see someone smoke I smile and breath deep and think how great I feel without that vise in my life. I now see how awful smoking is and hhow rediculous one looks with a cig hanging out of their mouth. The smell now makes me sick. I wish all smokers would be able to take this step and quit.

I have done a couple of different fasts. One water fast that lasted over 16 days and a "master cleanse" fast that was about 16 days. I have learned that we really can get by with less food in our system and a person can thrive when eating less. By letting the body rest from digesting you can experiance much healing. This is a powerful tool for ones health that must be done with care because of the toxisisty of the body.

The body thrives when given the best environment and it is up to us to create this environment. Some people write that our bodies are the temple of God and we need to clean that temple. For some reason I have been chalenged with the "cleaning of my Temple" I find myself becomeing very emotional and also fond myself challenged with radically different views on God and Religion. I have always been an open minded person but in many ways I have always been mostly Christian in my thinking. For some reason eating raw foods opens up new perspectives in spirituality. In some ways this challenges my training I have had in Christianity and makes me wonder about the other great spiritual teachers and what they have learned.

I have kept up this diary to share with others my struggles and sucesses in eating raw foods in hope they will benifit from what I have to say. I have found inspiration from many wonderful people on this site and feel comfortable here. I want to thank all who share on this site for their support. I really don't think I could have gone this far if it were not for the people on this site.

If you would put a percentage in eating raw I would say I have been mostly 100% raw but have eaten some lental soup last night. I feel I have made a break through with eating meat at least and I feel proud of that. With the help of my 14 year old I feel I have a stronger resolve to not eat liveing creatures. yea.

life is great raw but I have eaten some cooked last night. Today I had a large green smoothie.

Pam its so awesome to see this outpouring from your heart keep it up ..youve come along way and theres plenty to see/experience in the future

i spend alot of time reading the scriptures of other religions although being raised a christian .. i feel it is important to know what the other people in the world are beleiving and i dont feel this is a threat to me at all like i used too

i too am still on my journey and always experiences speedbumps, blips, bumps and jumps , i am down to the last 60-80lbs of weightloss to go ..its been a long journey so far ... 5 years to be truthfull and if it takes another 5 years to finish well .. that im ok with that as long as i am seeing and feeling and experienceing results then that is ok with me

Hi Pam!

Sounds like you are back on track again. I need a kick in my pants to get me started lately. I'm the only one around to do that and it is sometimes impossible to get my foot to connect with my butt..but I'm trying and haven't given up at all!

We should make a couple sweatshirts with some raw food logos and pics on them for the winter..I think I'll look for a couple at the thrift stores and then do a couple iron ons..or some fabric paint.

How's life out on the farm? The ponies? The kids? The other half?

Love,
Prism

I have been reading some wonderfull books lately. I found the library has oodles of great books.
The one that really is helping me right now is a small book on detox, it covers writeings on Johanna Brandt who cured herself on the grape diet. She was a strong willed woman who beat stomach cancer. She is one of our trail blazers in the raw movement. I have learned much out of that little book on fasting and our bodies ability to heal itself if given the proper conditions.

At this moment I am fasting and working towards doing a juice fast for a while. I feel more comfortable at this time not eating food because it seems the less food I have to digest the more energy I have. How ironic is that? I use to be concerned with myself about fasting but now I feel I find a strength in not eating at this time.

I started out mixing the lemon juice with maple syrup and cayanne pepper for the past three days. I am now feeling more clear in the head and contemplating the next step. I am not sure if I should start juicing or go for a little while with a plain water fast. So far this morning I am sipping some tea. I hope to maintain some energy level during this fast so I will probably start juicing.

I am around cooked foods all the time and have to prepare it for my family, I am sure if I were to create a different environment in what kind of foods I am around this would be much easier however this is life and I am sure this would strengthen me in some way.

I am trying to figure out the key to changing my thinking on eating raw. Just what is it that people who can change overnight from sad eating to raw food? Some of them write about a smooth transition and no looking back. Almost like a religious conversion. When I quit smoking I was determined to change and now I continue to renforce my non smoking with positive afermations and deep breathing everytime I see someone smoking. I quit smoking even though others in the house still smoked. Now we are a smoke free house, yaa. Perhaps I am missing something is making a firm change in my eating habits. I do have to be grateful for the changes I have made and the things I have learned. Sometimes I justify a bite or a boul full of popcorn and the door is opened for temptation to overcome me. Its like I have to be either all raw or not at all because when I take that bite of cooked foods is like opening pandora's box and all hell breaks loose.

Right now I am fasting and pondering just what is the key to change.