Good to have you back, Sundancer: glad that you had a wonderful time and that you got to visit with your friend and relatives; sorry that you didn't get to see your Mom (that seriously sucks - hope she's better!), and happy that you made it back safely!!!

You have your own garden, and your cousin in Hawaii has an organic farm - okay, NOW I'm officially jealous! ;}

Definitely keep us posted on the job situation...you must be so excited (read:sarcasm galore) to be heading back to the restaurant ***makes a face*** Have a great night; get some rest and we're looking forward to having our awesome threesome together again!!!

Hi Sundancer---welcome back. Great trip from the sounds of it, except for the fact you couldn't see your mother---hope she is better now.

Next vacation----Hawaii!

Good luck with the job. Might as well take it (get more money?). On the plus side, will you have any more leverage to shape things up? It's never that simple. sigh. I have been procrastinating looking for a job. I am carrying it very close to the line...when I look I will have to find something fast. I just don't want to! If that sounds extremely irresponsible and immature, well---there are two major character flaws of mine.

I am fasting and when I am finished with the fast I will look for a job. I may never eat again.

This is day 4. I have, surprisingly, had a small bm every morning. This is out of ordinary, but I am not complaining.

Breakfast: water.

I also had my coffee...this morning it was a couple swallows taken as about 40 sips. I also had my cigarette....which was gross and made my heart palpitate. The fasting condition throws these habits into a graphic demonstation. But I'm hanging onto them.

More water today, and more bedrest. Yesterday I had so much energy and by evening I felt like running or jumping up and down. This morning I feel more like getting some deep rest, in bed. I've been reading so much. Been watching some tv also. It is in living room. I had gotten rid of tv a year or 2 ago, such a good move that was. Now, since living here, have gotten sucked into it now and then.

At any rate, whatever I do, I am enjoying these last days of liberty.

Quick dash in here---5th day fasting. A friend called to go to lunch at People's so I went (had diluted apple juice for lunch). Was able to buy a huge bag Valencias. A few other things...several pounds of grapes, also prunes, romaine, and several other good items---for when I "refeed", which may be tomorrow. Also bought 1/2 watermelon of good red colour. That won't last long, so I guess I'll be eating it soon!

Feel quite well. Tongue is clear and pink in middle, and a little coated (more like a thin sweater) on sides. Strange. Usually it is a MESS! Nothing much to report about the fast, but an intermittent pain sensation in right side below ribcage. A discomfort only, comes and goes.

Emotional/mental "crisis" of sorts...cannot go into it...but it is/was very manageable and valuable. Like I was encased in cement and the cement started cracking and breaking up and falling down around me, like some belief system was in an earthquake. Still have some aftershocks and there is debris and I am still sorting it out....it is good.

The 4th day of fast saw the real shake up and all the crying---I think that maybe the fasting had something to do with it, like giving me more space, sensitivity, vulnerability to go through it. I don't know. Anyway, WOW.

Just have a few minutes...Soraya, hello hello....your last post deserves comment, it was fantastic, but I have to go right now. Will tune in later when I have more time. Sundancer, hello hello...how goes it? Tune in soon.

Love to both of you.

Enema last night.

Gardening work this morning. Am about to jump in shower as I am wringing wet. It is a little humid. And I still have this awful BO, armpits are going to cause a 911 call. I feel good though. Good energy. Better than before the fast. Sleep very well, but then I always do. A few nights I slept 10 hours.

Facial tone and eyes look better.

I was going to continue fast though tomorrow (it is so easy); however, I may start in on grapes and watermelon today. I have been reading Ehret and Walker; and also, last night I started rereading The Grape Cure by Brandt. It is much easier and better reading now than the first time. Grapes are really amazing...and I bought nearly 7 pounjds yesterday as I kept thinking Grapes Grapes Grapes and after picking up that book last night, I am glad I bought them, and wish I didn't buy watermelon. Oh well, I can eat watermelon too! So, I am looking forward to this. I would like to eat grapes for at least one day...I think this will be far far harder than not eating anything. Once I start, I will crave a salad, I know it. Also, I have melons in fridge and a papaya....possibly spoiling. I could do a melon day.

We'll see.

I ate. A large bunch of grapes, purple ones. OMG, so DELICIOUS! I chewed SOME of them very well, some not! These are wonderful grapes, thank goodness: very very tasty, juicy, sweet, yummmmmmmmy.

I walked down to friend's, she is on phone, so I'm on computer with my grape report.

I feel so full. Am a little bloated. Am waiting.....
Will anything interesting occur?

Now night, only nine, but I am sleepy. Have had about 3 or 4 grape meals, the last couple were small....I am so full. I also did eat a kiwi, as I know they are so full of fiber. No bm yet. Perhaps tomorrow morning. I feel so satiated. There has been some gas, slight bloating.

Tomorrow is Sunday, so I am going to my spiritual meeting after a breakfast of....you guessed it: grapes.

I also have nectarines and melons that I bought days ago...all ripe and thrown into refrigerator...so I should eat those tomorrow. When will I have a salad? No desire for one really (I am so full) but I occasionally think about it. I have romaine and I want to grate carrot, beet. And I have big ole colourful Heirloom tomatoes! I really have a lot of food. I need to get back to regular eating again! Or lose this food! And I have a big half watermelon staring at me every time I open refrigerator door to get grapes! Nectarines, one more golden kiwi, 2 melons (ripe), and 2 canary melons on table but I'm not worried about them. Anyway, grapes for breakfast. Watermelon for lunch? mmmm, maybe go in the pool and eat watermelon after...seems like a good script to me.
We'll see. Que sera, sera.
Anyway, grapes for breakfast.

Happy day to you (and to you, Sundancer)!

You are doing so well! You sound as if you are enjoying yourself, and I am very happy for you.

I wish that I could eat that many grapes - I love them - but they don't seem to love my teeth! After a remarkably small amount my teeth become somewhat sensitive, so I have to stop and am unable to indulge my grape desires...

Feel somewhat on the quiet side, but wanted to at least say hello and share the love; I have been checking up on you regularly, but was too introspective to leave a quick note...

Have a great day, beautiful you!

I definitely understand that, Soraya. I am often the same way. It's fine.

Grapes this morning (and had bm).
I feel very good. Went to spiritual meeting which was beautiful and just what I needed, like tailor made to me. Four of us went to People's afterwards and had lunch, and I went ahead and had salad. Had a prepared kale/golden beet salad and also took from salad bar some spinach, romaine and big heap of shredded beets and carrots, a couple tiny tomatoes and a teaspoon of celery. It was very good. Took nap after a little meditation. Now off to yoga. Am taking sweet watery grapes for afterwards.

Yoga yesterday, after the break because of the fast, was extremely difficult. I was often in savasana instead of poses. I did as well as I could do, and lost a lot of toxins from all the sweating.

Today's yoga class was a different story...it was so good, I was so much stronger than yesterday. Wonderful feeling after it was all done. Now, a little tired, very very relaxed.

Morning's food:
Grapes!
Smoothie of bananas, 2 plums, and several prunes and soaking water.

Post yoga:
Grapes! Probably more than a pound. We stopped by People's and I bought another 7 pounds of grapes.

I am about to prepare something. Heirloom tomato. I am going to scoop it out and mix pulp with basil, celery, red onion (tiny bit), and ?. Maybe a little dressing. Maybe some avo? We'll see.

Will watch the US OPEN. Oh, but I could also go to sleep. When will I have the energy to carry on strongly after yoga?

I ate the stuffed tomato with two olives on top. Put 1/2 avo in the mix, so I've had all the fat I can have for the day, first fat in over a week, I think.

I took the watermelon out and it is room temperaturing. Cannot eat cold watermelon. Tasted it----which made me look forward to it! Good! So sweet. It is seeded, organic (of course). So that is for later...only fruit the rest of the day, altho' basically my tomato thingy was all fruit too, except the sprig of basil and strand of chive. I really want to be eating mostly fruit for rest of summer. We'll see how I do. I am checking out the salads in Walker's book and there are some interesting combinations. So, salad once inawhile, of course.

I am so looking forward to yoga tomorrow! That sequence in sweltering heat and humidity is brilliant. Grueling, hateful and brilliant. Very important not to interrupt consistent practice. Yoga is not something to do once in awhile--especially Bikram yoga when you're 58 years old.

So, fruit tonight and a nice epsom salt bath and a good night's sleep. Coming up.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 08/26/2008 01:31AM by Elakti.

That's my girl...doing so well...

Good to see you're back to enjoying your yoga practice, and taking your time; so impressed with your dedication to this - way to go!

You are definitely my 'sister' - can't STAND cold watermelon, either!!! ;}

You mentioned Walker's book... which one, pray tell??? Wondering of it's the one I have...

Hope you've had a wonderful day - I have! Got a new Osho book among other things - and am looking forward to your report!

Difficult day. Difficult yoga....(very much what you talked about in your last post, S.) Stress on mind concerning looking for work, going back to work...very depressed.

Yoga today...much of my weak nature was in full throttle, fueled by depression about going back to work and wondering what it will be like looking for a job, and I skipped a lot of poses and cried through a lot of class.

I've eaten a lot of olives. It was fat food, grasping. Otherwise, good smoothie, and lots of grapes, nectarines. Also a small salad of romaine and a tomato and ... olives. Olives galore. I can feel the urge to eat fat, because of my mood. I can hardly go into the whys and wherefores of my mood today, but it is largely centered on escapism, tendency to "quit", give up. That was the theme of my yoga class today. At least I stayed in the room and sweat and cried. I wanted to take up my mat and towels and run. I don't want to go back to work, I am seriously almost sick at the thought of it. There was much anger, fear, and frustration coming out during yoga. I could hardly deal with it.

Your last post was so good, S. and I wish I were "there"...those are things that I am definitely working on, very much aware of (am I ever!), and today...well, not doing so well with them. This will pass though, I'll find way back to my strength and presence. There are so many layers of all this @#$%&, sometimes I feel I am breaking out of the same shell, over and over again. Need to meditate.

Feel better this morning.
Grapes, banana milk, grapes, grapes.

Spent hours this morning in patio, sweeping, dead-heading, cleaning up plants, watering, spreading grass cuttings around. It looks nice.

Will make juice soon, carrot/beet/celery.

I think I may have been going through a bit of detox/cleansing yesterday. I felt not so good all day and by evening even felt woozy and ill, very ill at ease. Finally went to bed as I couldn't even read or stand myself...!!!...and slept very well and long. I have been eating lots of grapes and they are deep roto-rooters.

Very indrawn today, but quiet and peaceful with myself. Juice and meditation coming up. Friend called and invited me to swim. She wants company (and wants to see cutie-patootie-little-dog) and I don't want to talk.

I wonder if this escapism/run away/quit/don't wanna is a core karmic thing that will never leave. I think so. I think it's best purpose though is to channel it positively and escape to my own self/inwards/spiritually...and, through that refuge be more equipped to deal with my daily karmic life and responsibilities. I need to cultivate that inner maturity and peace because otherwise out here I am a weakling. I am also strong...I have had to fight this weakness all my life. I have survived. I get by. So, I think both: I am strong and I am weak. Considering all the weakness I have dealt with I am a bloody samurai. So how do I think I am both strong and weak...does it depend on perspective or am I just confused or is this fragmentation of my view of myself or is it just semantics blaaah blaaah blaaah. There is definitely a worldly weakness, from the general society point of view, and it is also not my arena...but, I have to function. Ah, help.
Soraya, sometimes you can say something that helps me. Say it, please.

I want to sit still, quiet. I feel good. I don't feel weak. I don't feel strong. I just feel so quiet and soft inside.

Another report/update/clarification

I am healthfully sick! Definitely in more cleansing/de-tox and now I realise I have been for at least 3 days...explains the awful weakness I felt in yoga class yesterday (body so heavy and muscles so weak), and the low spirit/depression, and lassitude, and ill-feeling last night. I feel it again, it started a few hours ago and I feel now quite icky. So heavy, tired, weak, muscle-achey, cold (and had sneezing fit of about 15 sneezes...so fun! I LOVE to sneeze! )

Yup, I thought about this before fasting....it has happened every time I fast when feeling good...it brings on de-toxification POST-fast. And since the fast I have eaten so many grape meals and grape snacks and eaten so cleanly 100% raw all organic, mostly fruit.

So, this shouldn't last long. I need to find work! Whew, am I decked though.

I can hardly keep eyes open, and I wanted to watch US OPEN.

I had a salad, was CRAVing a salad. It was outrageously delicious. Romaine, heirloom tomato, celery, a few olives with so delicious tahini dressing. Now, ready to konk out.

It will be nice to get through a year of raw. The cleansing will go on and on and on, I know...but, a year's worth should find me a lot healthier. I sure don't feel healthy now. I feel that heavy pulling dragging sensation like I'm magnetized to the middle of the earth. Yup, time to get in the bed.

Am MAD busy right now but just wanted to pop by to check in on you and say hello...

Will try to pop in later to comment more, but just wanted you to know I am thinking of you and behind you 1000%!!!

SMOOCHES!!!!!

S.

Hey girls!

I've been off the computer for a while (in case you haven't noticed ;p ) because I've been spending lots of time in my garden and trying to catch up with housework and getting ready for a new school year. Not that I'm in school, but Little has this week off and next week is a "new school year" for her, so I thought I'd make it a time to organize my life as if I were starting a new school year. I always made great leaps in productivity when I did that, and I must confess, this summer I've allowed myself to slack in many ways. So now is a good time for me to do this. Also, work is drastically changing for me -- it's like a whole new job -- it actually is a new position, and I'm being trained in new duties as well as having my hours increase. We also just hired two new servers (I'm training both of them at once -- a first) and another manager who will co-manage with me. So lots going on there.

I still haven't been where I want to with my diet, but probably 50-75 % raw for now. Next week when my daughter goes back to school and my schedule gets sorted out, raw foodism, yoga, workouts at the gym, meditation time and art time are definitely getting put high on the priority list. Maybe I'll do a little fast too. I know I have some toxicity to get rid of, and I don't feel like doing it with a bunch of transition in my life is a good thing. So I'm thinking mid-September will be good. The restaurant will slow down for a few weeks, and it will be a good time to detox and boost my state of being.

Elakti, I'm proud of you for your fasting and eating habits lately -- and the yoga! And going to bed when you feel like you need to. I fight that one, but not lately; I've been sleeping a lot lately. I feel like I've been really lazy in a lot of ways, but like I said, that's about to change, because my mindset is feeling like getting out of that mode.

More later; take care.

Hi Sundancer, nice to hear from you again, you've been missed. Good luck with the new position, hope it works out nicely. It sounds like a good time to catch up and organize everything else around you, it's a good feeling to have as much squared away as possible as you begin a new venture. Let us know how all is going, as we've missed your presence! 50-75% is good. Do you feel any better when you are more percentage raw?

Banana/nectarine/lettuce smoothie this a.m. Grapes.
Had errand to do and when I got back I was so hungry. Made juice: carrot/beet/cucumber/dandelion greens/celery. Then, made a salad of spinach leaves, watercress, a little romaine, tomato, with a little shredded sweet potato (!) and about 3 chunks of apple (for sweet and surprise factor), and one half walnut crushed over it. Oh, and a few kalamata olives. Delicious.

Now watching tennis.

Am very into greens, salad. Craving them, and they taste so great to me.

The juice is wonderful. What a help to the elimination, the juice seems to assist the colon notwithstanding the fact there is no fiber to speak of.

This morn. I weighed 160 until I had the elimination, after which I weighed 159 or a little less even. TMI? I could tell the juice was involved.

Someone today said, "how much weight have you lost!?"
41 pounds!

I'm wondering where my comrades are. Just busy, I hope all is well.

I had a smoothie of bananas, grapes, and romaine. Ate some grapes.
A few hours later, made salad of baby spinach covered with processed carrot, beet, sweet potato, with a few olives and some diced cucumber and a couple walnuts---very filling.

Meditated some. Was not able to go to Satsang this morning, so I meditated while it was going on.

Yoga yesterday was very hot and difficult. I had the usual pervasive weakness, weakness of mind and body. I had talked briefly to the instructor (one of best, and one of the most demanding---he doesn't allow much deviation from 110% effort) about the problems I am having recently of muscle weakness and we agreed I need to be more consistent with the practice. I usually do well enough during his class, but yesterday I did not do well. The heat was high (which is saying it was probably 115 -ish) and my mind was resistant as well as my body. I did not finish the class, and I haven't left class even to leave the room for a long time. There were others in the locker room so I wasn't the only one. (very hot class) I was staying in savasana during second set of Rabbit and teacher called me on it, and also referred to our conversation. He said that it was why I was so tired from class because I did not bring energy to my practice...I did not appreciate this, of course, and so when we got to camel and I could hardly even get up on my knees and thought I was going to pass out, I grabbed towel and water and left. I know I need to do better by doing daily practice, I know I DO need to continue to address my mental/emotional weakness---there is no doubt about that. I am a baby. I AM a quitter. I complain it is too hot, it is too hard. Yesterday though I just couldn't do any better. And it throws into my face too the fact that I am a fool to smoke and try to do that yoga in that room. This could play a large part in the weakness and tiredness, the difficulty with breathing in 115 degrees what to say of going through that sequence of asanas. So I take responsibility and that guy is still one of my favorite teachers.

Discipline, discipline, discipline. I need to do the practice at home, full class at least every other day. I need to quit smoking.

Tomorrow I need to look for a job. Today I need to make vegetable juice.

I feel pretty good, although I do feel the pressure to quit smoking, as I feel sick from it very much lately. My food is good. There are plums and pluots ripening which I am looking forward to, also mangoes. I'm out of grapes. Wow, are they delicious.

I went out to eat with someone the other day, at People's. I had huge salad and also had a little soup! I could not finish it, altho' it tasted good to me. The next morning I woke up to mucous in throat and sinuses. Amazing, isn't it? Not really!

Ok. Enough for now. Soraya, and Sundancer, where are you?

Hey Elakti, I'm here; just busy with work and "real life" and my daughter didn't have school last week, so I didn't get much time to be on the computer.

Tomorrow I plan to get back into the groove of self-care and rawness again. I miss it and need it. Yesterday was my grandma's 90th birthday. She has cancer and is ready to die now, and was hanging on for her party. She said something yesterday that really resonated with me: Eat right now, cleanse your body now, because you don't want to wait until it's too late, which is what she feels like. And it really is a good world, but we make it bad (by our behavior). Basically I got from the conversation that I need to make the good life I want for myself, not rely on fate, but when fate deals me good things to go with them, to use my wisdom to do good for myself first, then for others as I take care of myself. So I'm feeling reflective, like I need to meditate on my life and make adjustments that are going to make my life as good as it can be, to strike the balance and stay in that balance.

I'm not going to be on the computer every day, but I will when I can.

Have you tried cutting way back on smoking as a transition to quitting? It's a tough one, but I know you can do it!

Take care.

looking for job these days...daze
Money is short and I am not so well stocked in food. I am not eating as much fruit and there is the problem. I see a big difference in the way I feel. I also ate some cooked food the other day and am still feeling the consequences of that. It wasn't so bad on the stomach but getting through the rest of the system...I will go to the store and get some oranges and grapes...did pick up some grapes from People's. They are so delicious, so needed. I will shop for the most economical fruit, inquire into the cost of oranges by the case. I have to do without the melons and the papayas and the other more expensive fruit. But, fruit I need. Been eating lots of salad. But, definitely feel the lack of fruit. This is a good demonstration to me, as I am not eating my optimal diet these days...too little fruit!

So things are a little in disarray right now, but I feel that it will all work out.

Hi I was just reading your post. I have a question. Is dehydrated food considered raw? I empathize about lack of funds and not being able to buy the necessary foods to maintain optimal health. I was thinking about a dehydrator. I own one and haven't used it in years. Would need a serious cleaning. When fruits are on sale, couldn't we dry them? I think that concentrates the natural sugars but these dried fruits could be re-constituted in water. I am going to see a lecture on Friday night by David Wolfe on raw foods. If no one has the answer, I could ask him this question. We could dehydrate food in the oven or in the sun, too. Just a thought.

Linda
Long Island NY

Hey, guys!
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} to you both!!!

I'm still alive - and still around - but have been really busy around here the past few days; I've also been having a seriously FUN (read:major sarcasm, here) time with galloping emotions and flaring (ungrounded!) energy...*sighs* I'll be fine, but sometimes it's a little tough to enjoy the process / remember not to kick against it, but to process and ease through it...

Elakti, this (your last post) has been my main concern about you in the past week or so; I am praying that you will be working soon! Low finances and food supply is no joke, but especially to someone who eats like we do... And congrats on the weightloss, and the deeper insights you've been having!

Sundancer, good to hear from you! I know you must be very busy, what with new work responsibilities on top of everything else. Just remember to pencil in - nope, PEN in! - some time for yourself as well, okay?

Wildflower Woman, dehydated food IS considered raw...good to see another NYer around here...

Have a great day, ladies!

So cleaning up the old dehydrator and buying fruits on sale is what I am going to do. I have two pear trees whose branches and boughs are so heavy with fruit, that I could feed Manhattan - well maybe not Manhattan but a lot of raw fooders.

Do you participate in the Brooklyn Raw Food potlucks?

Linda

Ummmnn...pear trees heavy with fruit, eh??? Please don't give me any ideas! I don't like eating pears - it's a textural thing - but I LOVE juicing them... I'd love to take some of them off your hands ;}

Nah, I haven't been able to (go to any potlucks) as yet, but would love to at some point; I don't know anyone in the 'real' world who is also raw, so would be so neat to actually meet others face-to-face. I eat so simply, though, that I wouldn't know what to take and would probably have to take my own stuff with me - or eat beforehand!

Hi Wildflower, nice to meet you! Pear trees, how lovely, and fortunate. Do you make smoothies? Pear smoothies sounds good. I am not into dehydrated food, never have been. Occasionally I have bought a little bag of dehydrated fruit, for example I bought some jackfruit pieces, to get an idea of its flavor. I usually reconstitute and use in smoothies...or most of it goes to waste. I don't like dehydrated crackers either. But, if you have that many pears....How long have you been raw?

Soraya-----well well well, HELLO! So good to hear from you! Having lots of FUN, huh? I know what that is like. You'll come through smelling like roses.

Got some oranges, and grapes, a few other things. And I may soon have an interview at People's! Fingers crossed.

Yoga this afternoon. Standing poses are getting better, and then....on the floor for those poses, well, I nearly die. Left the class early again. Couldn't breathe, lost all strength, and I know why.

I feel pretty happy though at the moment. Relaxed.

Elakti Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> Soraya-----well well well, HELLO! So good to hear
> from you! Having lots of FUN, huh? I know what
> that is like. You'll come through smelling like
> roses.

Yeah, having LOTS of fun...if that's what you want to call it!!! But I do appreciate the transformation occuring in tandem with it, so I'm practicing being present and in the moment...yesterday was MUCH, much better, I must say, and I didn't feel as though I was floundering like a fish out of water ;} ;} ;}

> Got some oranges, and grapes, a few other things.
> And I may soon have an interview at People's!
> Fingers crossed.

YEA!!!!!

It would be totally awesome if you were to score an interview and be able to work there! You wouldn't have to plan your shopping trips anymore, for one...keep us updated, please!

> Yoga this afternoon. Standing poses are getting
> better, and then....on the floor for those poses,
> well, I nearly die. Left the class early again.
> Couldn't breathe, lost all strength, and I know
> why.

I'm glad you're getting the chance to take so many yoga classes. Be patient with your self; you're doing well. And if what you're talking about is the smoking, just try to decrease the amount little by little as you work through the why of it - other than the fact that it's addictive, of course...

> I feel pretty happy though at the moment.
> Relaxed.

You're such a strong, amazing woman (yes.you.are!!!!). Celebrate yourself today!!!

Sundancer and Wildflower, have a great day too!

Hello everybody!

Another hot sunny day (too hot for me).

Yes, it is the smoking I am referring to re: yoga. I appreciate you and Sundancer advising me to cut back little by little. Unfortunately though, this is not possible. It would be like a full-fledged alcoholic cutting back to one or two beers...impossible. Or they wouldn't be alcoholic. I am such a cigarette addict with all the insanity of addiction: if I try to cut back I smoke more. It is impossible. It has to be total abstention. This is utter folly. I have to go for it again, quitting. Oh, Lord, help me. It is the hardest thing for me to do, it is so painful. The empath/psychic I saw also told me my suspicions are correct. The smoking is intrinsically and deeply wound into an unconscious complex (or more), especially to childhood experiences. I still will keep trying and it looks like, woe is me, it has to be soon. A very near-future NOW, like today...sometime...today...oh, I dread it, it is so horrible. Almost hysterical misery. I want health, I want to do yoga, I want to be free of this habit...so much. But, it is like opening Pandora's box: all hell breaks loose. The patch and the gum are helpful. Otherwise I couldn't do it, short of some kind of incarceration.

Okay, that's that sad story. Otherwise, I am meditating and feeling much better! I am not all raw anymore, and have to address this also. I am eating a little cooked food everyday. This is a bit of a choppy tide right now but the boat is intact and I am riding the waves. Sort of.

The thought of quitting smoking, without going "overboard" (lol) with bad food....uh oh....I swear, trying to pull everything together is just a barrel of laughs or a crock of something else. It's like trying to get together in one place with one purpose a cast of thousands.

Have a great day to everyone from every one of me!

[www.youtube.com]

He has a book, it probably doesn't cost much more than a couple of packs of cigarettes if you decide to track it down. He makes a lot of sense!

Good luck!

Sapphire

Elakti,

Thanks for explaining more about how difficult the smoking issue is for you; I now have a better grasp of how challenging this is / has been for you. I'm behind you, and still believe that you can accomplish what you want to...

>It's like trying to get together in one place with one purpose a cast of thousands.

Couldn't have said it myself! That's kind of how I'm feeling now as well!!!

Quitting the cig habit is very hard. I quit last summer when I was eating 100% raw and have not smoked since. I have quit so many times in the past and really hated the habit. I replaced the cig habit with breathing. Every time I wanted a cig I took several deep breaths and when I saw someone smoking I told myself how odd it looked on that person. I hope you can quit but the best thing is to eat raw foods and you will begin to feel the strength to quit the habit. Wheat grass is very helpful because it cleans out the nicoteen from your system. Its been a year now since I quit and I still cough up green phlem.